IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emission which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emission which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#first #energy #australian #household #second #greenhouse #gas #emission #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The charts give
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information about how
energy
 is used and
gas
emissions
 which result from
energy
use
 in Australia.
First
Change the article
The first
show examples
chart
 illustrates household
energy
use
 and
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
chart
 illustrates household greenhouse
gas
emissions
.
Overall
 ,
gas
emissions
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 lighting and refrigeration are 2 times more than
energy
use
. Heating
energy
use
 is not as much as
waste
Add an article
a waste
show examples
 of
energy
 water heating and waste of
energy
 are almost same and, other appliances
gas
emissions
 is not as less as
energy
 .
According to
 the first
chart
, half of
full
Add an article
the full
show examples
energy
 is used for refrigeration and the least
energy
 is wasted for cooling . The
energy
use
 of cooling , lighting and refrigeration
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 not as much as others.
According to
 the second
chart
,
gas
emissions
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 water heating and other appliances are more than others and, cooling is
also
 the least. The most important
energy
 feature for Australian households was heating, followed by water heating, at 42% and 30% respectively.
However
,
emissions
 from
this
energy
use
 were 15% and 32%, respectively
Submitted by buyabuya201 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, gas, emissions, use, chart with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "illustrates" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Energy consumption
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Household activities
  • Heating
  • Water heating
  • Cooling
  • Appliances
  • Proportion
  • Efficiency
  • Insulation
  • Energy-efficient
  • Sustainable practices
  • Reduce emissions
  • Environmental impact
  • Carbon footprint
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