Some people believe that zoos where animals are kept in a man-made environment should no longer exist in the 21st century. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #zoos #animals #environment #st #century

Some say that animal parks

shold

Correct your spelling

should

be closed today,

while

others say the opposite. I strongly believe that

although

an artificial place can harm creatures that live inside it, I believe the healthcare service

that is

provided for them is better in these places. Some people think that parks for wild creatures

such

as tigers, elephants and penguins should be closed because they live in captivity in small cages, and

therefore

not being in their natural habitat damages them.

As well as

freedom restriction, a life without interaction with the other components of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nature has bad effects on animals' psychology and physical well-being because life without is not familiar to them.

For example

, the average death caused by

age

Correct article usage

the age

show examples

of giraffes happens at much

Change the word

apply

show examples

younger times in captivated ones.

However

, I do not think not engaging

any

Change preposition

in any

show examples

interaction with nature

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

Correct article usage

a more

show examples

negative impact on species than natural threats.

While

others argue that being behind glass in certain facilities

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

more beneficial for animals because the healthcare system is at its peak in these

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

, the best food is given to them and they take their vitamins each day, and

due to

the reproduction system, certain kinds can

last

longer than expected. Take Sugar, a special kind of elephant in Russia's natural park,

for instance

, she has been saved from blood cancer recently and

such

care cannot be given to her if she was in her natural habitat. I believe so as to keep the well-being and the diversity of wild ones, zoos should stay open.

To conclude

although

captivating species

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

drawbacks in terms of their health, I believe because of the professional care, they are more healthy in

such

facilities.

Submitted by :DDDDD on Fri Apr 12 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure

Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, supported by examples or reasons.

Vocabulary

Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely. Avoid repetition of words and phrases.

Grammar

Pay attention to grammatical accuracy. Review usage of articles, tense consistency, and sentence structure.

Content

Provide specific examples to support your arguments. This can strengthen your claims and make your essay more convincing.

Balanced Argument

You presented a balanced view and addressed both sides of the argument, which is good for fully responding to the task.

Conclusion

Your conclusion succinctly restates your position and summarizes the main points, providing a clear closure to the essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

Ethical considerations
Wildlife conservation
Artificial habitats
Species preservation
Breeding programs
Animal welfare
Ecological awareness
Habitat destruction
Captive breeding
Educational outreach
Physical wellbeing
Psychological stress
Regulatory compliance
Domestication vs. wildness
Natural behavior
Economic viability
Tourist attractions
Cultural perspective
Public sentiment

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people argue that it is important to have a university degree to secure a good job, while others believe that work experience and personal skills are more crucial. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
A handful of people hold the opinion that it is vital to possess an undergraduate degree in order to have a career. On the other hand, there are also many that opine to that opinion stating that soft skills are more crucial. In this essay, I will delve into both of these opposing views and provide my personal opinion.
6.5
band
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Often times job seekers are asked about personal particulars like their hobbies, interests, or marital status. Many people consider it as necessary while others show concerns. In my perspective, candidates must not share such information until it is mandatory for the specific job roles.
6.5
band
Some people think learning history in school is important. Others think learning subjects more relevant to life is important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In this day and age, how to become global citizens is often a controversial topic that often divides opinion. While many people claim that historical knowledge contributes greatly to one's success in life, others believe that a deep understanding of various areas also plays a key role. To my mind, it is completely true that learning different subjects equally is of great importance.
<4
band
Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today´s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is good to know the history. However, some people argue that STEM subjects are more important than history. In this essay, I am going to discuss both views which is history most important or STEM subjects are more important.
5
band
Some people think that the government should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles in order to solve environmental problems. To what extend to you agree or disagree?
These days, several people think, if the fuel price rate increases, which prevents people from using more and more personalised vehicles. This is because the surge of the figure may unable to afford for the majority of the population; eventually, they may start to depend on the public transports, rather than their own car. Take car pooling as an example, this was the new initiative, when the government introduced a new method to counteract the problem of pollution by doubling petroleum oil rate. And they were successful for a great extent. Many reports have shown that this hike reduced the amount of carbon emission in the atmosphere significantly.

Some people believe that zoos where animals are kept in a man-made environment should no longer exist in the 21st century. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people argue that it is important to have a university degree to secure a good job, while others believe that work experience and personal skills are more crucial. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think learning history in school is important. Others think learning subjects more relevant to life is important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today´s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the government should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles in order to solve environmental problems. To what extend to you agree or disagree?