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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you fing it very difficult to work. write a letter to the accomodation officer at the college. in this letter: . describe the situation . explain your problems and why it is difficult to work . say what kind of accommodation you would prefer

#room #college #student #arrangement #work #accomodation #officer #situation #accommodation
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Dear Mr/Mrs In
this
 letter
i
Capitalize word
I
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 want to
say
Verb problem
tell
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 you that
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 can not stay with my roommate, she is so noisy. I am a student
of
Change preposition
in
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16th
Correct article usage
the 16th
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 room on
3rd
Correct article usage
the 3rd
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 floor. Let me
explane
Correct your spelling
explain
 my situation, my roommate
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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games and
listen
Correct subject-verb agreement
listens
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 the music so loudly all night or sometimes she
invite
Change the verb form
invites
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 her friends and they play
untill
Correct your spelling
until
 morning. I can not
consentrate
Correct your spelling
concentrate
 on my study and
i
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I
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 can not get enough sleep. Please transfer me or my flatmate to another room. I would prefer a partner who is not very noisy. Please do something Thank you for your attention. Florence Ann
Submitted by jasurutamuradov on

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Detail Expansion
Consider adding more details to fully explain the situation and your specific needs.
Tone Adjustment
To improve writing tone, try using more formal language and expressions.
Structural Improvement
For coherence, make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and the letter flows logically from introduction to conclusion.
Clarity of Explanation
You've clearly described the situation and why it's difficult to work.
Assertiveness
Your request for a new accommodation preference is clear and to the point.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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