University students always focus on one specialist subject, but some people think universities should encourage their students to study a range of subjects in addition to their own subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the third millennium, It may be conceded that universities play a vital role in
educational
Add an article
the educational
show examples
system.
Hence
, The
openions
Correct your spelling
opinions
about how subjects ought to be
thought
Verb problem
taught
show examples
in university are divided
wheater
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
to
one
particular area or various subjects.
This
essay will delve into why a unique
subject
studying is more convenient and beneficial.
To begin
with, the proponents of
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
one
matter claim that
put
Wrong verb form
puts
show examples
forwards
Replace the word
forward
show examples
positive impacts on
students
. To clarify,
one
factor which has led to
this
is providing
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
professional
backgroung
Correct your spelling
background
. Needless to say, the burden of
resposibility
Correct your spelling
responsibility
of being ready for future careers lies in the hands of tertiary education, achieving expertise and experience for
students
, with
consideing
Correct your spelling
considering
one
unique
subject
.
Consequently
,
students
, working on just
one
area, tend to have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
higher exposure and
stroger
Correct your spelling
stronger
expertise in their future
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
.
Moreover
, most people would generally agree that studying
one
unit of science is more reliable.
Thus
,
one
justification often given for
this
is that can bring a regular mindset.
Whereas
, pupils, working on more than
one
subject
,
may be
Correct your spelling
maybe
show examples
lost their
destinantion
Correct your spelling
destination
and their future purposes
likewise
, their desired job.
As a result
,
one
area
studying
Change preposition
of studying
show examples
tend
Correct subject-verb agreement
tends
show examples
to be more structured, planned, and
aim focused
Add a hyphen
aim-focused
show examples
,
while
various units of study
seems
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
to be confusing and distracting.
To sum up
, with regard foregoing pragraphs it can be stated that
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a certain
subject
may be proved as a better option in some facets.
Consequently
, it is my firm
convication
Correct your spelling
conviction
that education ought to
focuse
Correct your spelling
focus
on just
one
subject
, providing professional job experiences and a strong mindset for
students
.
Submitted by mahdisonbolestan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Grammar and Spelling
Begin by carefully proofreading your essay to correct grammatical errors and typos. Mistakes such as 'The openions' instead of 'The opinions' and 'studing' instead of 'studying' can detract from the overall clarity of your argument.
Development and Support
Develop your main points with more detailed examples and explanations. While you've outlined the advantages of focusing on one subject, incorporating specific scenarios or studies could strengthen your argument.
Structure
Ensure that your essay has a clear structure with distinguishable paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion. Use transition words effectively to connect paragraphs and ideas smoothly.
Sentence Variety
Work on varying your sentence structures to enhance the readability of your text. This includes mixing simple, compound, and complex sentences to create a more engaging and professional piece.
Critical Thinking
Consider introducing a counter-argument or a paragraph discussing the potential benefits of studying various subjects before reasserting your stance. This will provide a more balanced view and demonstrate your ability to engage critically with the topic.
Thesis Statement
You provided a clear thesis statement and attempted to back up your opinions with reasons, which is crucial for the task.
Organization
You consistently attempted to organize your ideas logically, making your essay's flow relatively easy to follow.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!