Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In today’s competitive
job
market,
employers
often ask
job
applicants for personal
information
, including their hobbies, interests, and marital
status
.
While
some argue that
this
information
is relevant and useful, others contend that it is unnecessary and even discriminatory. In
this
essay, I will discuss both views and offer my own opinion. On the one hand, those in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of
employers
asking for personal
information
argue that it can help
employers
get a better sense of an
applicant’s
personality, interests, and values.
For example
, if an employer is looking for a team player, they might be interested in knowing if an applicant is involved in sports or other group activities.
Similarly
, an
applicant’s
marital
status
could be relevant if the
job
involves significant travel or relocation, as a single person may be more willing and able to take on
such
demands than someone with a family.
On the other hand
, those who oppose
employers
asking for personal
information
argue that it can lead to
discrimination
and bias.
For example
, an employer might make assumptions about an
applicant’s
suitability for the
job
based on their gender, race, or sexual orientation.
Similarly
, an employer might make judgments about an
applicant’s
availability or commitment based on their marital
status
or parental
status
, which could lead to
discrimination
against individuals who have caregiving responsibilities. In my opinion,
while
some personal
information
may be relevant to a
job
,
employers
should exercise caution in asking for it.
In particular
,
employers
should avoid asking for
information
that could lead to
discrimination
or bias,
such
as an
applicant’s
age, gender, race, or sexual orientation.
Instead
,
employers
should focus on asking for
information
that is
directly related to the
job
requirements and that can help them make a fair and objective decision about the
applicant’s
suitability for the role. In conclusion,
while
there are arguments for and against
employers
asking for personal
information
from
job
applicants, it is important for
employers
to be mindful of the potential for
discrimination
and bias. By focusing on
job
-relevant
information
and avoiding discriminatory practices,
employers
can create a fair and objective hiring process that benefits both applicants and the company.
Submitted by amandacflago23 on

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Examples
To further improve, consider including more diverse and specific examples to directly illustrate how personal information can impact the hiring process positively and negatively.
Cohesion
While your essay is well-structured, there's always room for enhancing the transitions between paragraphs for smoother flow. This can be achieved by using more varied transitional phrases and by linking ideas more explicitly.
Task Response
Ensure that the connection between the discussion points and the essay question is always explicit. This helps to maintain a strong focus on the essay prompt and reinforces the relevance of each argument.
Introduction
Your introduction effectively sets up the discussion, providing a clear overview of the essay's content.
Balance
You've demonstrated a strong ability to discuss both sides of the argument, showing a balanced and well-considered approach.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and clearly states your opinion, reinforcing the essay's overall argument.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • job application
  • personal information
  • hobbies and interests
  • marital status
  • relevant
  • useful
  • privacy
  • assessing candidates
  • qualifications
  • experience
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