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Band 4.5

Many people work from home using modern technology today. Some people think that only the workers benefit from this and not the employer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #work #home #technology #workers #benefit #employer
In
this
 era, working from
home
 has become popular after the pandemic (COVID-19) among
workers
. Some believe that
this
 is beneficial for
employers
 and others have the opinion that employees have more advantages. I will discuss both views and give my opinion
at the end
.
To begin
 with, there are several advantages for
workers
, doing
work
 from
home
. To explain, employees can
work
 in their comfortable environment and position without missing their families.
Moreover
, they save their time and cost as well
while
 not using their private cars which helps to environment.
In addition
,
this
 gives the opportunity for flexible hours, they can
work
according to
 their choice if they have other
responsibility
Fix the agreement mistake
responsibilities
show examples
 to complete.
Therefore
,
workers
 can do
proffessional
Correct your spelling
professional
work
 side by side
personal
Change preposition
with personal
show examples
work
 and can save time which will
spend
Wrong verb form
be spent
show examples
 on
tranportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
.
On the other hand
, people who think that
employers
 get more benefit from
this
.
For example
, if
workers
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
 come to the office,
this
 saves bills and time for companies.
Furthermore
, it helps to increase their productivity and decrease expenditure.
Employers
 are relaxed
while
 working at
home
 so they can achieve more tasks,
consequently
, improving their production.
Thus
, companies should allow their
workers
 to
work
 from
home
 without any
restriction
Fix the agreement mistake
restrictions
show examples
 to achieve more tasks.
To conclude
, In
this
 modern technology, working from
home
 is increasing.
According to
 my opinion, both have advantages for employees
such
 as flexible hours and time-saving and for
employers
,
such
 as increasing productivity and saving more money.
Submitted by AP on

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Task Response
Ensure a clear thesis statement that directly addresses the extent to which you agree or disagree.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve coherence.
Task Achievement
Introduce specific examples to support your points, enhancing the depth of your arguments.
Content
Provided a balanced discussion on the benefits of working from home for both employees and employers.
Structure
Structured the essay well with an introduction, body paragraphs for each viewpoint, and a conclusion.
Coherence
Used paragraphs effectively to separate different ideas.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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