Write an essay discussing the pros and cons of smartphones
Smartphones
makes
a profound impact Change the verb form
make
in
everyone's life but Change preposition
on
also
carry demerits with it
. I will explain the advantages and disadvantages in the following paragraph.
In current Correct pronoun usage
them
time
, smartphones are the main source of Fix the agreement mistake
times
the
communication for many individuals . Correct article usage
apply
People
living abroad feel connected with their family members by doing video calls and text messages . Thus
, people
relationship Change noun form
people's
bond
become stronger even Fix the agreement mistake
bonds
living
miles away . Correct word choice
while living
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
this
, with the help of this
technology
, many things are easily approachable while
seating
at home Verb problem
sitting
such
as online shopping , online banking and education . Therefore
, advancement in technology
inevitable boon to humans these days by saving time
and keep
them productive at the same Wrong verb form
keeping
time
,for instance
, remote work.
However
, there are some drawbacks with
Change preposition
to
this
technology
such
as people
feel
disconnected Wrong verb form
feeling
with
each other nowadays as compared to 100 years back . In past , Change preposition
from
people
who live
abroad Wrong verb form
lived
send
letters to each other , it almost took Wrong verb form
sent
7to
10 business days to Correct your spelling
7 to
reach
Verb problem
send
letter
to their destination and when it Correct article usage
a letter
arrives
, Wrong verb form
arrived
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
feels
more emotionally connected by reading it . Wrong verb form
felt
Additionally
, human beings spend most of their time
in
social media apps Change preposition
on
such
as Whats App
, Correct your spelling
WhatsApp
Instagram
and Correct word choice
and Instagram
this
causes strain on their brain and feel
disconnected from real life .
In conclusion , Smartphones have both merits and demerits .Change the verb form
feels
Although
this
technology
weakens the emotional attachment in human beings and causes health issues , also
provide
major Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
benefit
by communicating with Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
people
living far from home and provide
online employment facilities are undeniable.Wrong verb form
providing
Submitted by kmlchahal97 on
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General
Provide clear, specific examples to support your points. This makes your arguments more compelling and tangible.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on clear paragraph transitions and linking phrases to enhance the logical flow of your essay and make your argumentation smoother.
Task Response
Consider exploring both sides of the argument more equally to provide a balanced discussion. This will strengthen your essay's task achievement score.
General
Carefully proofread your essay to correct typographical errors and improve sentence structure for greater clarity.
Task Response
You provided a balanced discussion by outlining both the advantages and disadvantages of smartphones.
Coherence & Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion succinctly present your essay's overall argument, aiding its structure.
Content
You touch on relevant social and technological aspects, showing a good understanding of the topic.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...
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