Write about the following topic. Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In
this
contemporary world, any new product can
be know
Change the verb form
be known
show examples
through different kinds of advertisements.some people say that it motivates us to
purchase
things we do not necessary and others
says
Change the verb form
say
show examples
that it gives information about
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
product in the market . I partly agree with the statement and discuss both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
views.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
the one hand ,we come across
different
Add an article
the different
show examples
medium
Fix the agreement mistake
mediums
show examples
of advertising in
every day
Correct your spelling
everyday
show examples
life on billboards , social media , pamphlets and televisions. When we watch all
this
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
us
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
purchase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
products which we do not need at all.
For instance
, during
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Christmas
Add a comma
Christmas,
show examples
there
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
an advertisement on Facebook stating
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
50 % off on
Air
Correct article usage
an Air
show examples
fryer
Fix the agreement mistake
fryers
show examples
which
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
me
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
purchase
after looking offer , once I brought it hardly
use
7 times
till
Change preposition
apply
show examples
now it's been 6 months
cause
Correct word choice
because
show examples
it is not necessary to me for daily
use
.It happens to many people
tempt
Wrong verb form
tempted
show examples
to
purchase
which is not essential.
On the other hand
,certain advertising
educate
Change the verb form
educates
show examples
the public
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new products , what are their
use
, how can we
use
in
Correct pronoun usage
them in
show examples
our daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
and how can we make our lives easy . There are smart
vaccum
Correct your spelling
vacuum
cleaners in the market which
vaccum
Correct your spelling
vacuum
house themselves
with out
Correct your spelling
without
show examples
human intervention just
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one click .
For example
,
while
going to work every day I
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
to
saw
Wrong verb form
see
show examples
billboard
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
about Anytime fitness
gym
Change noun form
gym's
show examples
zero joining fee ,which make me
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
join
gym
Add an article
a gym
the gym
show examples
and become a habit of training every day as
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
it gives me good fitness
as well as
mental health.
To sum up
,it has both benefits and
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
advertisements, so choose wisely before you buy something and question yourself
you
Correct word choice
whether you
show examples
won't
Correct your spelling
want
show examples
it or not .
However
, some ad gives insight view before we
purchase
as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
play
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
role in our daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Submitted by nikhilguni on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Consider using topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to clearly state your main points. This helps the reader understand your arguments better.
grammar
Pay attention to the accuracy and range of your grammatical structures to enhance clarity and precision in your argumentation.
cohesion
Incorporate a wider variety of linking words to smoothly connect ideas and paragraphs, thus improving the flow of your essay.
accuracy
Proofread your essay to correct minor spelling and punctuation errors, as they can distract the reader and detract from the coherence of your argument.
examples
Successfully provided relevant examples to support your points, making your arguments more persuasive.
balance
Your essay addresses both views of the argument, demonstrating an understanding of the topic and a balanced perspective.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: