In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In
this
day and age, the advent of technology and a plethora of innovations have made living more comfortable for human beings, creating way higher life expectations for individuals. As a consequence
, the number of old people
is increasing in the society
. Nevertheless
, some assert that elderly people
are a burden; I side with those who believe these people
have more benefits for their community, attempting to outline some underlying reasons for this
.
One argument is that elderly people
are not as productive as younger generations, creating complications for society
members. Many people
after their seventies wouldn't work possible, and if they do, they are not efficient enough. Also
, a considerable proportion of the state's remuneration, which is mostly raised by younger generations paying taxes, is spent as pension for them. Provided that fewer elderly people
are alive, these taxes could be used to improve the health and education system or upkeep of public transportation and amenities, resulting in a more prosperous and flourishing society
.
However
, the advantages of the existence of elderly people
far more compensate for their disadvantages in case of their knowledge and experience. Having experienced decades of difficulties in different eras, aging
Change the spelling
ageing
people
would help youngsters, showing them the best ways to overcome challenges in their careers and private lives. Furthermore
, they are bound to be the most precious assets alive in the case of culture, as they link us to our ancestors. When each old individual dies, it is as if a library full of books about knowledge and culture would be buried.
In summary, although
it is understandable that the older generations might be a deterrent to their community in some cases – a case in point is the financial drain on their pension – they can absolutely be beneficial when it comes to their knowledge, as they signify and connect society
members with their maternal language and cultural identities. Moreover
, their advice may be helpful for youngsters so that they can lead a fruitful working and personal life.Submitted by TUTOO on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance coherence.
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Integrate more concrete examples to strengthen your arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all supporting sentences are directly related.
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Your essay presents a clear position on the topic throughout.
Coherence & Cohesion
You have effectively structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
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The use of relevant examples to support your points, though more specificity could enhance your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.