In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, a
course
that is
based on
work
is becoming increasingly popular. In several countries, human beings are choosing it
besides
studying at
university
.
This
essay will discuss the pros and cons of
this
topic. On the one hand,
work
-based
education
is more short-term than
university
-based
education
. Most of these kinds of courses are provided by companies, which may guarantee
work
after
course
completion.
This
means, that the salary will be available after the
course
is finished.
Additionally
, a
work
-based
education
gives practical experience, which the
university
does not. In
this
case, young individuals may get
work
skills and knowledge, which will help them to adapt
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to job
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
easily in the future.
On the other hand
,
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
gives more specific knowledge than a
work
course
and is more of a long-term study.
Furthermore
,
this
kind of knowledge is more respected and
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apply
show examples
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
essential to the companies.
As a result
, it is more possible to find a
high-paid
Correct your spelling
high-paying
show examples
job
.
Moreover
, universities give a bachelor's degree, which may outweigh a
work
-based certificate
hundred
Correct article usage
a hundred
show examples
times.
Consequently
, most companies require
degree
Correct article usage
a degree
show examples
only a certificate won't be acceptable, In conclusion,
work
-based training is an important and hot topic for young people today. On top of that, it gives them more short-term
education
than
university
, which often gives them a
job
and personal skills.
However
,
university
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the university
show examples
offers more advanced and longer
education
, which may be suitable for
high-position
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the high-position
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
job
and a good salary. From my point of view, it may be better to invest in yourself and attend
university
, because it offers us more better life than
work
-based training.
Submitted by sosokhurtsidzee on

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Structure
Introduction and conclusion are well-defined, but ensure the body paragraphs are balanced in supporting both sides.
Language
Try to integrate more varied and complex sentences to enhance cohesion.
Content
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Content
Good job on presenting both sides of the argument, showcasing an understanding of the topic.
Structure
You have a clear thesis statement and conclusion, which helps in structuring your essay effectively.
Coherence
Your essay shows good logical flow from one paragraph to the next, making your arguments easy to follow.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-based training
  • enrol
  • university
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • practical skills
  • experience
  • workforce
  • employment
  • earnings
  • opportunities
  • further education
  • theoretical knowledge
  • career options
  • exploitation
  • balance
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