IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Traffic jams are a problem in many towns and cities today. Some people say that the solution is to build wider roads. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that many cities have congestion as their problem and some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that expanding the size of the roads would overcome it.
However
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, I strongly disagree with
this
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 solution and provide a reasonable explanation from my standpoint. First of all, it is undeniable that the number of cars and bikes is increasing significantly these days.
People
Use synonyms
 need
transportation
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 to take them to their offices, malls, markets, and any other facilities.
But
Correct word choice
However
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, citizens may usually end up purchasing private vehicles because of the lack of public
transportation
Use synonyms
 in the city.
That is
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 why it is crucial to construct the infrastructure of public transport and build a system that can be easily used by the
people
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.
For example
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, a special line for public buses or a wider network of trains or trams.
Secondly
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, it is
also
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 useful if
people
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 receive an incentive when they take mass
transportation
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.
For instance
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, a person who leaves his car in the parking lot at the station has free admission to commute by train across the city in the first month. The traffic jams will be reduced and
furthermore
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, the
people
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 could be happier because they are no longer stuck in the congestion.
Thus
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, it is important for the government to make a new regulation which could stimulate
people
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 to leave their own vehicles. In conclusion,
although
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 some
people
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 believe that building wider roads is the solution to the traffic jams, I firmly remain convinced that the solution is by making a larger infrastructure of public
transportation
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 and giving an incentive to the
people
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 who dismiss their own car or bike.

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Lexical Resource
Try to provide a wider range of vocabulary to express your points more precisely.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Work on integrating a variety of complex sentence structures to enhance the sophistication of your response.
Task Achievement
Clarify and develop your examples more thoroughly to strengthen your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion which makes it easy to follow.
Task Achievement
You presented a well-argued case against the proposition, showing good understanding of the task.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Traffic congestion
  • Alleviate
  • Commuter
  • Carpooling
  • Rush hour
  • Carbon footprint
  • Urban planning
  • Mixed-use neighborhoods
  • Cycling lanes
  • Pedestrian paths
  • Intelligent traffic systems
  • Congestion charges
  • Peak times
  • Telecommuting
  • Public transportation
  • Remote working policies
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