University should accept equal number of male and female students in every subject. What extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Some

people

Use synonyms

arguing educational institutions must equally join boys and girls.

However

Linking Words

, all students should

be have

Change the verb form

have

show examples

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

opportunities to fully study all specialised. So ,

this

Linking Words

process may be

enormous

Add an article

an enormous

show examples

expense for it. On one hand, offering' scholarships should

be originally grant

Change the verb form

be originally granted

show examples

to all genders.

For example

Linking Words

, in some countries, some subjects

learned

Add a missing verb

are learned

show examples

only by men and

this

Linking Words

inconsistent

Add a missing verb

is inconsistent

show examples

with

this

Linking Words

attendance.

Moreover

Linking Words

, if we were not enabling female students

as well as

Linking Words

men,

this

Linking Words

would be

Change preposition

in completely

show examples

completely

Change the word

complete

show examples

contrast with the human rights agreements. So, schools' states should completely

remain

Correct your spelling

retain

show examples

all materials studied by all

people

Use synonyms

regardless

their

Change preposition

of their

show examples

gender.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, these claimants may be fully cost to those providing teaching services.

For instance

Linking Words

, governmental organs could impose additional taxes

Change preposition

show examples

rich

people

Use synonyms

to support educational purposes.

In addition

Linking Words

, some

argues

Change the verb form

argue

show examples

these are unavoidable costs because some fields

disgree

Correct your spelling

disagree

with

women

Change noun form

women's

show examples

nature.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, psychical collages

requiring

Wrong verb form

require

show examples

great

efforts

Fix the agreement mistake

effort

show examples

, for

this

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

incredible idea and unnecessary monetary for states.

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

there are considerable arguments

opposite

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that all fields learned by women. I agree that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

educational chances should be equally divided among all

people

Use synonyms

mohammedelhassan811Sun Apr 14 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Consider using clearer and more specific examples to support your arguments. This will help strengthen your main points and make your essay more persuasive.

Coherence & Cohesion

Work on structuring your essay more effectively. An introduction, clear paragraph structure, and a conclusion help make your arguments more digestible and enhance the flow of your essay.

General

Review and edit your essay for grammatical accuracy and clarity. Misunderstandings and ambiguities can distract from your main points.

Content

You've shown an understanding of the necessity for equal opportunities in education across genders, which is commendable.

Task Achievement

Your essay presents a clear stance on the topic, which helps in making your argumentation straightforward.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

188 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
It is important for people to take riske, both in their professional lives and their personal lifes. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Risk facilitates to burgeon. Whether people should be risk-takers or not is a controversial theory. I strongly believe that the benefits of this approach are valued superior to its drawbacks, Since not only could it promote evaluation ability, but also it lunches individuals on the path of unprecedented success. However, what devastating impacts it may involve are stress and losing recent achievements.
7
band
Many major cities are facing a housing crisis as they cannot provide enough land for new buildings. Some local governments believe the problem could be solved by reassigning park land for residential development, because this land would be better used for housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays, there is a significant problem in a lot of big cities. This problem concerns the lack of land for building construction. However, a solution that has been proposed by governments is the use of parkland for housing development. In my opinion, this initiative is excellent and there are lots of reasons for it to happen and, indeed, it is necessary to occur soon.
6.5
band
Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport while others think that mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion?
Some believe that success in sport mainly depend on physical health while others claim that being strong-willed is a key factor leading to this success. This essay will discuss both viewpoints and this writer thinks that both of them play a vital role in becoming successful athletes.
9
band
Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programmes (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). Do you agree or disagree?
In the current era, some individuals firmly believe that high school students must participate in voluntary community service. I totally agree with this opinion. It seems that this kind of voluntary job exerts a positive effect on teenager’s character. In addition, they can earn work experience through this involvement.
6.5
band
Banking and its role in our life. Methods of paying.
Nowadays, the banking system, methods of payment and storage of money have changed dramatically. Banking and funding are very important for the functioning of the modern world. Without a banking system, the way we profit from capital would not work. They allow people to save money, borrow money and pay for things with ease and security.

University should accept equal number of male and female students in every subject. What extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

It is important for people to take riske, both in their professional lives and their personal lifes. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport while others think that mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programmes (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). Do you agree or disagree?

Banking and its role in our life. Methods of paying.