The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

#diagrams #show #changes #place #west #park #school #construction

The map shows major changes that happened at West Park Secondary School over a 30-year

time

period

and its proposed plan in 2010.

Overall

,the main road remained the same throughout the

period

but houses and

farm land

Correct your spelling

farmland

show examples

disappeared from the map.

Firstly

,houses were converted into car parking and a science block in 1980.

In addition

,a science block was added to the main school building during

this

time

.Farmland faced a major change.It was replaced by a sports field in 1980,which was replaced by car parking in 2010.

In contrast

,the main road remained the same throughout the

time

period

On the other hand

,the sports field was shifted to the right and car parking took place in 2010.

Additionally

,the playground was reduced from its original size in that given

time

period

Submitted by ashraftaukir on Sun Apr 14 2024

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Replace the words time, period with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

125 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

University students are increasingly studying abroad as part of their studies. Do the advantages of studying abroad outweigh the disadvantages!

Traditions are about the past and innovation is about the future, and it has been argued that we need to let go of traditions for the sake of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? What role should traditions have in our lives?

Many people believe social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?