Over the past decade, there has been an alarming rise of nearly 20% in the proportion of obese children in Western societies. Analyze the factors that contribute to this concerning pattern
In the past decade, youngsters have faced excess fat in one-fifth of Western countries. There are numerous reasons for
this
, Linking Words
such
as consumption patterns and sedentary lifestyles, and I will Linking Words
also
highlight some possible consequences, including health risks.
Linking Words
To begin
with, one of the initial issues is that teenagers are becoming more and more accustomed to eating fast food since their parents give them money to do so. They choose the simplest and easiest food Linking Words
as a result
. Linking Words
For instance
, junk funk restaurants serving pizza, burgers, and other items are widely accessible and available in Linking Words
western
nations. Capitalize word
Western
Therefore
, they have a higher amount of fat because these snacks are high in fat and low in nutrition. Linking Words
Moreover
, Linking Words
children
’s lifestyles are becoming less prevalent. Use synonyms
For instance
, watching television and playing video games for an extended period of time has made them “couch potatoes." Linking Words
Thus
, it has been seen that fast food consumption and sedentary Linking Words
behavior
are two minor causes of childhood obesity.
On top of that, being overweight can have certain detrimental consequences for Change the spelling
behaviour
children
. Use synonyms
First,
Linking Words
children
might get chronic diseases Use synonyms
such
as “diabetes," which is not usual at Linking Words
such
a young age. Linking Words
Furthermore
, its treatment consists of a specific injection given every day. Linking Words
Second,
Linking Words
according to
medical knowledge, overweight Linking Words
children
have low immunity. Use synonyms
For example
, they may be the first to develop a cold or fever when the weather changes. It goes without saying that increasing weight can cause a variety of illnesses.
Linking Words
To conclude
, Linking Words
this
essay has demonstrated that Linking Words
children
's obesity is primarily caused by their calorie-dense diet and inactive lifestyle. Meanwhile, it causes a number of health issues in the early stages of their lives.Use synonyms
Submitted by yohanatheresia98 on
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Introduction
Ensure a clear thesis statement is present in the introduction to guide the reader.
Body Paragraphs
Try to provide more diverse and precise examples to support your points.
Coherence
In the development of paragraphs, make sure each idea directly supports the topic and is followed by a specific example or explanation.
Conclusion
When concluding, clearly restate your position or summary of the main points, indicating a clear end to your argument.
Language
Use a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance clarity and demonstrate language proficiency.
Content
You effectively linked obesity in children to specific causes such as diet and lack of exercise.
Structure
The essay structure is clear, with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Relevance
You have followed the essay prompt well by discussing relevant factors and consequences of obesity.
Your opinion
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