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Band 6

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

#experts #children #language #school #outweigh
Nowadays, there are continual arguments between
children
 who should learn
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
 at primary
school
 and
children
 who should learn a different
language
 at secondary
school
.
This
 essay will find
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 and disadvantages of those two viewpoints and draw a conclusion
at the end
.
To begin
 with, one of the main
advantages
 of starting to learn a foreign
language
 at primary
school
 is that younger
children
 are generally more receptive to new languages and can pick them up more easily. Their minds are still developing, making it easier for them to grasp the rules and structures of a new
language
. By learning a new
language
,
children
 are able to better understand and communicate with people from different backgrounds and cultures.
This
 can help to foster a sense of empathy and understanding towards others,
as well as
 open up opportunities for future travel and career prospects.
On the other hand
, studying
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
 at secondary
school
 has a lot of
advantages
. Most middle
school
 students have a more developed
language
 than elementary
school
 students, so their pronunciation will be very good when talking to people in the country.
In addition
,they are good at memorizing things ,
therefore
,when they
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
 a new
language
, they learn new words and grammar well, and
thus
 they can learn the
language
 well. In conclusion,
while
 there are both
advantages
 to starting to learn a foreign
language
 at primary
school
 and secondary
school
 , learning an overseas
language
 may ultimately outweigh the benefits of learning a different
language
 at secondary
school
.
Submitted by buyabuya201 on

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Task Achievement
Work on developing your ideas more thoroughly with specific examples to support your arguments. Your essay touches on important points but could benefit from more depth and detail.
Task Achievement
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which is good, but ensure your conclusion more explicitly states your stance on the issue to strengthen your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve coherence, try to create smoother transitions between paragraphs and ideas. This will help your essay to flow more naturally and make it easier for the reader to follow your line of reasoning.
Task Achievement
You have done an excellent job in presenting both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach to the question.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear, which helps in effectively setting up your essay and summarizing your main points at the end.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • pronunciation
  • self-conscious
  • cultural awareness
  • global society
  • proficiency levels
  • competitive job market
  • foundational skills
  • qualified teachers
  • recreational activities
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