IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people prefer to livewith a roommate.Others prefer to live alone. Compare the advantages of each choice. Which of these two options do you prefer? Use specific reasons to support your answer

#people #livewith #roommate #choice #two #options #support
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While
 a number of individuals choose to live alone, others opine that sharing an accommodation with roommates is a better choice. I am convinced that
this
 situation depends on the personality traits of a certain human being. As far as I am concerned, it is better to live with someone in one place. In
this
 essay, I plan to spotlight a few thoughts of mine to substantiate my point of view
along with
 specific examples. On the one hand, when a
person
 lives separately, he has a kind of freedom that means that nobody can mess up his day with habits and activities that might mismatch his own
ones
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
For example
, one
person
 can be an early bird,
while
 another can be an owl.
This
 crucial difference will prevent them from living under the same roof. Obviously, if you are the only
person
 who lives in the room, you can arrange your day independently as you want.
On the other hand
, the prominent pro of having a roommate is a financial factor. To elaborate, housing generally requires expenditures that might be not affordable for an individual to cover alone. In
this
 situation, sharing expenses is quite attractive.
Additionally
, if a
person
 is sociable and likes to communicate, a roomy will be a good companion who will brighten up the evenings.
For instance
, I had
such
 an experience in my life, when I was a student in college, and a girl whom I shared the room with is still my best friend. In conclusion,
although
 a lonely life has
such
 an advantage as freedom, I still believe that having a roomy is more beneficiary in terms of affordability and gives a
person
 an opportunity to find a lifelong friend.
Submitted by ruben.kirakosyan on

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General
To further improve your score, focus on adding a variety of complex sentence structures and using a wider range of vocabulary. This will enhance the sophistication of your writing.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within it closely support that idea. This will strengthen your essay's coherence.
Task Achievement
For an even stronger task response, consider exploring each viewpoint more deeply. This could involve discussing possible drawbacks or more nuanced perspectives regarding each living situation.
Organization
Your essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which aids understanding.
Use of Examples
You effectively used examples to support your points, making your arguments more convincing.
Task Response
You addressed the task prompt well by comparing the advantages of living alone and with a roommate, and stating your personal preference.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • reduce living expenses
  • shared costs
  • companionship
  • feelings of loneliness
  • household chores
  • privacy
  • personal space
  • compromise
  • independence
  • personal growth
  • personal conflicts
  • harmonious living environment
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