In many countries governments are investing in new technology to dealt with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
In an ever-progressive society, there is a growing trend towards investment of authorities in new technicalities around the globe.
This
issue is due to
the many benefits that the internet provides which affect many range of people in getting on well with unhackneyed automation.
Central to this
issue is the point that advanced technology provides society with a large number of utilities. In other words
, the Internet enables local communities, regions and, nations to develop, attract, retain and, expand job-creating businesses and institutions. It also
improves the productivity and profitability of large, small and, home-based businesses and allows them to compete in local, national and global markets. By digitizing government services and information, e-government
can streamline administrative processes, reduce paperwork, and save time and money. For example
, electronic information systems are being applied in Vietnam and many countries around the world have contributed to demographic control. Hence
, the ultimate goal of e-government
is to provide an increased portfolio of public services to citizens in an efficient and cost-effective manner.
Perhaps, there are some witnesses who prove that ultramodern technology have a detrimental effect on social life in the near future, inaccessibility in many people bracket. E-government
sites that provide web-based access and support often do not offer the potential to reach many users, including those who live in remote areas, have low literacy levels, or exist on poverty-line incomes. Some sort of hybrid system may be required to co-exist as the e-government
journey transitions. Thus
, inaccessibility is one of the drawbacks of new technology.
In conclusion, e-government
can enhance citizen's services in many ways. Nevertheless
, it also
has a negative impact on many users.Submitted by khoi11nk11e on
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Task Response
Ensure you directly address both questions in the task. You've discussed why governments are investing in new technology effectively but could expand more explicitly on whether this is an appropriate use of government money.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure, but consider using more varied linking words and transitional phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. This will improve the flow of your essay.
Language Use
Incorporate a wider range of sentence structures to enhance the complexity and flow of your writing. Varied sentence structures contribute to a more engaging and sophisticated essay.
Structure
You have a strong introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your argument and providing a clear overview of the topic.
Content
You provided relevant examples to support your points, which strengthens your arguments and makes your essay more convincing.
Task Response
The essay maintains a consistent focus on the topic, demonstrating good task achievement overall. You've answered the prompt in a structured and logical manner.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.