IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government universities.

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Nowadays, new
technology
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
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 being invested by
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government
Add an article
the government
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 to serve
community
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the community
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.
This
Linking Words
 writer argues that they are enhancing
quality
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the quality
show examples
 of speech and the suitable way is
that
Correct determiner usage
the
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finacial
Correct your spelling
financial
 of
government
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being
Add a missing verb
is being
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 used
resonably
Correct your spelling
reasonably
responsibly
. It can be understood that
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 invests in new
technology
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for improving
Change preposition
to improve
show examples
 their presentation abilities.
This
Linking Words
 is especially so if higher priorities want to express their ideas and
determines
Correct subject-verb agreement
determine
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 clearly
to
Rephrase
how to
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 tackle some unsolved problems. They
also
Linking Words
 want presidents
Fix the infinitive
to believes
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believes
Change the verb form
believe
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at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 high-tech and its features, as it can help them gain more
knownledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 about
digital
Correct article usage
the digital
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 era.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
technology
Use synonyms
 can
also
Linking Words
 enhance
life
Correct your spelling
the
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 quality of citizens and it can hold
good
Add an article
the good
a good
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 image of
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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 with
public
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the public
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, there are some
campaign
Fix the agreement mistake
campaigns
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 that
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 takes place to
popular
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popularise
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 some future plans of charity and they take maximum potential of
technology
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 to outline clearly ways to avoid making mistakes. Another
arguement
Correct your spelling
argument
 worth considering is that
Use synonyms
government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
show examples
 are using their
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 logically, especially in education. Nowadays, digital eras are becoming more popular and
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 becoming
more
Change the word
apply
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higher,
demand
Replace the word
demanding
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students
Use synonyms
 work out and study more.
Therefore
Linking Words
, investing in new
technology
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 and state-of-the-art facilities for national colleges
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
worth
Replace the word
worthwhile
show examples
 and suitable for those situations. They can invest
amount
Correct article usage
a amount
show examples
 of high-tech
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 colleges and
students
Use synonyms
 can use it for research and gain more
knowleges
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 about their era on the internet.
For instance
Linking Words
, there are lots of universities
are
Wrong verb form
that have
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 invested
new
Change preposition
in new
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
 for their
students
Use synonyms
 and it helps
students
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understanding
Wrong verb form
understand
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virtual
Add an article
the virtual
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 environment and
using
Wrong verb form
use
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 it reasonably.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
technology
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takes
Verb problem
plays
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 an important role
of
Change preposition
for
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human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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 in daily routines and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 them a lot
on research
Change preposition
in researching
show examples
 new things. For these reasons,
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
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 should invest more
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
The essay addresses both parts of the question, but more specific examples and clearer argument development would enhance clarity and relevance.
coherence cohesion
Consider using more paragraphing to clearly separate ideas and improve readability. This helps in organising arguments more effectively and guiding the reader through your essay.
grammar and vocabulary
Double-check for grammatical errors and try to use a wider range of vocabulary to more precisely express your arguments. This attention to language can significantly improve the overall quality of your writing.
task response
You've made a good effort to answer both parts of the question, showing an understanding of the topic.
structure
The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a clear framework for your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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