In many countries government are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
In recent years, governments are spending large
amount
of money on new Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
technology
to tackle public’s
Change noun form
public
problem
in many countries. The primary reason for Fix the agreement mistake
problems
this
trend is the high demand on the internet all over the world and the effect of robots and AI, therefore
the government completely exploit the use of money.
It must be accepted that investing money in new technology
such
as AI for healthcare, e-learning platforms for education, and smart infrastructure for cities, represents a progressive step towards modernizing public services and improving citizens' quality of life. This
is because,
modern Remove the comma
apply
technology
provides convenience and flexibility by using it in many ways for studying. Take America as a prime example, where people using
robots in teaching or they Wrong verb form
use
also
use AI in many producing industries to have a
better efficiency.
Another thing worth Remove the article
apply
consideration
is the effectiveness it Replace the word
considering
makes
in the future. Wrong verb form
will make
This
means that,
technological advancements facilitate better data management, leading to more informed policy decisions and streamlined governmental processes.
Remove the comma
apply
For example
, many AIs can show a
Remove the article
detail information
a piece of detail information
detail
information about the healthcare for people when they go to the hospital.
In conclusion, despite the high demand for Replace the word
detailed
technology
nowadays, people should adapt the
new Change preposition
to the
technology
and live with it. However
, governments should invest more in AI and robots to improve the efficiency in
the workChange preposition
of
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task achievement
To improve your task achievement score, ensure that your argument is fully developed with more detailed examples. Consider expanding your ideas by explaining how technology specifically benefits government-public interactions.
coherence cohesion
Your essay benefits from a clear introduction and conclusion. However, to enhance coherence, make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next with effective linking phrases.
coherence cohesion
Incorporating more varied sentence structures and transitions could enhance the cohesion between your main ideas, making your overall argument more persuasive.
task achievement
Your essay effectively outlines the reasons governments invest in new technologies and touches upon the benefits of such investments.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay follows a logical flow, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in making your argument coherent.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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