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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table shows the worldwide market share of the mobile phone market for manufactures in the years 2005 and 2006.

The table shows the worldwide market share of the mobile phone market for manufactures in the years 2005 and 2006.
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The table compares
global
Correct article usage
the global
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selling
Replace the word
sales
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 of cell phones
producing
Wrong verb form
produced
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in
Change preposition
by
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 various companies between 2005 and 2006.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 Nokia stood at the highest rate of selling in two years
although
Linking Words
, BenQ mobile had the lowest place among all companies. Regarding the statistics of 2005, what stands out from the scheme is that Nokia, Motorola and Samsung with 32.5, 17.7 and 12.7 respectively had the main parts of worldwide marketing. Both Nokia and Motorola followed a slight increase by 2.5% and 3.2 % sequentially
however
Linking Words
, Samsung decreased slowly from 12.7% to 11.8%. Focusing on 2006, displays that Sony Ericsson experienced
noticeable
Correct article usage
a noticeable
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 climb
by
Change preposition
of
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 1.1%. LG mobiles had a negligible decline by .1%
moreover
Linking Words
, BenQ mobile dropped remarkably from 4.9 %to 2.4 %and other brands fell substantially by 3% at the same time.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
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