An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online.

Online shopping is the most common method of shopping in
this
modern Era. There are
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of vendors
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
online shopping
such
as time saving.
However
, it
also
has some cons for
both
shoppers and sellers which I will be discussing in
further
paragraphs. To commence with, fulfilling needs through phones for
people
is very much
easy rather
Correct word choice
easier
show examples
than being in a shop which is more
time consuming
Add a hyphen
time-consuming
show examples
. As
people
take time to go
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
shop,
then
choose things and
then
wait in line to pay.
This
whole process usually
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
30 minutes
however
, it just needs
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
taps to buy
stuff
through
phone
Add an article
the phone
show examples
.
In addition
to
this
, buying
stuff
through apps is much cheaper than
stores
Change preposition
in stores
show examples
. There are many apps that offer the
stuff
at half prices as compared to the stores.
For example
, temu and Ali
express
Capitalize word
Express
show examples
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
individuals
saves
Change the verb form
save
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of
money
. Moving forward, as much
a
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
online shopping is good for consumers, it
also
benefits companies. As sellers can reach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a wide range of customers by
cresting
Correct your spelling
creating
show examples
websites
for national and international customers.
This
can
also
flourish
Verb problem
boost
show examples
company's
Correct article usage
the company's
show examples
financial status by increasing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sales to
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
level.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
selling
stuff
through network portals is easy to ship and stock, it
also
helps small business owners to flourish their business from ground level
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
less cost as they are able to work and sell their products from home.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it has many pros, it
also
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
some drawbacks
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
both
parties.
Firstly
,
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
ordered online can be a misfit.
For example
, every country
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
a different body measure chart, so
ordered
Wrong verb form
ordering
show examples
from
a
Change the article
an
show examples
international country can lead the
product
to misfit as it can be big or small
according to
their own
country
Change noun form
country's
show examples
body measure chart.
In addition
to
this
, by buying online, folks are not able to do the quality check before buying which can lead to waste
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money
as sometimes, products are bad quality and
doesn't
Change the verb form
don't
show examples
last
long. To add up to the idea, there are many frauds happening through
websites
, as some
people
make fake
website
Fix the agreement mistake
websites
show examples
and steal consumer's card details and their
money
.
This
drawback
also
impact
Change the verb form
impacts
show examples
the companies because the scams make
people
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
do less shopping through open
websites
.
The another
Remove the article
Another
show examples
cons
Fix the agreement mistake
con
show examples
is
product
damage which
affect
Change the verb form
affects
show examples
both
seller
Correct article usage
the seller
show examples
and buyer.
While
shipping, if the
product
gets damaged,
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
loses
money
as the customer
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
refund
Add an article
a refund
show examples
from the
company
along with
that, some customers post bad reviews on
Correct article usage
the company'
show examples
company'
Change noun form
company's
show examples
website too which can impact their sales.
To conclude
, online shopping has
both
cons and pros,
however
the advantages overweight the disadvantages. So, as long as
people
shop carefully through online
websites
, it is more efficient.
Submitted by jvirk2468 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentence transitions
Ensure the organization of your essay follows a clear logical progression. While your essay structure demonstrates an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, fine-tuning sentence transitions would further enhance coherence.
Sentence structure variety
Introduce more variety in your sentence structures to improve readability and create a more engaging essay. Employing a mix of complex and compound sentences can add depth to your writing.
Detailed examples
To enhance your task achievement score, consider adding more detailed examples and evidence to support your points specifically. While you have provided general examples, more tailored examples would strengthen your argument.
Spelling and grammar
Pay attention to your spelling and grammar, making sure that minor errors are reduced. While minor errors may not significantly impact your score, reducing these can polish your essay.
Precision in language
Be mindful of the accuracy in using terms. For instance, 'vendors of online shopping' might be better expressed as 'advantages of online shopping.' Precision in language contributes to clearer communication.
Balanced discussion
You provided a balanced view by discussing both pros and cons for individuals and companies, which aligns well with the task requirements.
Effective introduction and conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, presenting the topic clearly and summarizing the main points concisely.
Use of examples
The use of examples such as Temu and AliExpress to illustrate points is effective and helps to demonstrate understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: