IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

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It is prevalent that the existence of several wild animals
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 on the edge of extinction, and some of them have
also
Linking Words
listed
Add a missing verb
been listed
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 as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
endanger
Wrong verb form
endangered
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species
Use synonyms
. I think, the reason
from
Change preposition
for
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 that situation lies
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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habitat
Use synonyms
 loss and
over exploitation
Add a hyphen
over-exploitation
show examples
 by humans.
However
Linking Words
, by ruling
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
strict regulations,
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
problems can be tackled effectively. The first reason is, a massive
habitat
Use synonyms
 loss
that is
Linking Words
 caused by human
activities
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 phenomenon can be evidently seen in some countries
such
Linking Words
 as
Indonesia
Use synonyms
. It is reported by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
CNN
Indonesia
Use synonyms
 that annually, Indonesian governments can burn approximately 30% to 40%
trees
Change preposition
of trees
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 for palm tree plantations and logging
activities
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
,
subsequently
Linking Words
, results in the degradation of food sources
as well as
Linking Words
 the disturbance in food webs, which later restrain the probability of wild animals to strive since there are no foods to eat as their source of energy. As revealed
further
Linking Words
 by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
CNN
Indonesia
Use synonyms
,
due to
Linking Words
 that activity the proportion of rare Sumatera Tiger has dwindled 10% from its previous number
due to
Linking Words
 their
suffer
Replace the word
suffering
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 from hunger, as the
habitat
Use synonyms
 of their prey has gone.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
 fuelled by
over exploitation
Add a hyphen
over-exploitation
show examples
 that has
occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
 in some nations. In fact, some extinct and
endanger
Wrong verb form
endangered
show examples
species
Use synonyms
 are being hunted down by humans
due to
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
their valuable net worth. Take,
for example
Linking Words
, the Kasuari Bird which has
declared
Add a missing verb
been declared
show examples
as
Change preposition
apply
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an extinct
species
Use synonyms
 by Indonesian governments because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
exaggerating
Replace the word
exaggerated
show examples
 hunts that
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been conducted by locals to possess its fur that
worth
Add a missing verb
is worth
show examples
to
Verb problem
apply
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almsot
Correct your spelling
almost
 1,000 million USD. Even though that detrimental situation is inevitable, there are some ways to help mitigate the given risks. Imposing a strict regulation to limit human
activities
Use synonyms
 that can obstruct natural environments is the most effective way to tackle the problems. In
Indonesia
Use synonyms
, the implementation
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 that method has been conducted in various ways
such
Linking Words
 as giving
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
exclusive terms and requirements to some big companies when they want to do industrial
activities
Use synonyms
 in natural
Use synonyms
habitat
Fix the agreement mistake
habitats
show examples
 or giving
fine
Fix the agreement mistake
fines
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 to irresponsible people who simply break the laws. Since that
regulations
Fix the agreement mistake
regulation
show examples
 has been imposed, there
is
Wrong verb form
been
show examples
 a report from
Kalimantan
Correct article usage
the Kalimantan
show examples
 governor that the
species
Use synonyms
 of
orang utan
Correct your spelling
orangutan
show examples
 has incrementally climbed by 10 per cent compared to the previous year. In conclusion,
habitat
Use synonyms
 loss and
over exploitation
Add a hyphen
over-exploitation
show examples
 caused by human beings can certainly make some
species
Use synonyms
 extinct.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, I think the primary solution for
this
Linking Words
 is to start imposing specific regulations to limit human
activities
Use synonyms
 that potentially destroy their
habitat
Use synonyms
.

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Grammar
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Accuracy
Double-check your work for occasional typographical errors or minor grammatical mistakes to enhance readability.
Vocabulary
To further enrich your essays, use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and avoid repetition.
Introduction
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion, clearly outlining the essay's focus.
Supporting Examples
You provide clear examples and reasons supporting your points, enhancing the essay's persuasiveness.
Conclusion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the essay’s main points and restates your stance, providing a strong finish to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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