Everyone should adopt a vegetarian diet because eating meet can cause health problems. Do you agree or disagree?

Over the
last
twenty years, vegetarianism has become popular among various segments of the population. Some people don’t eat
meat
because it’s considered animal killing. Others can’t afford to buy
meat
due to
the high cost of
meat
. Another
adopt
Verb problem
is
show examples
that
meat
isn’t
a
Change the article
apply
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necessary to nourish our
body
. In my opinion, that
diet
has disadvantages. In the first place, when
person
Add an article
a person
show examples
limits himself in the consumption of animal protein, they will have health problems in the future. As scientists show, protein
improve
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improves
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all systems of
organism
Fix the agreement mistake
organisms
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such
as
immune
Correct article usage
the immune
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, digestive,
muscle
Correct word choice
and muscle
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systems. Since a vegetarian
diet
individuals don’t get daily protein requirements, those who
follows
Change the verb form
follow
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
nutrition are more likely to suffer from overwork during everyday activities or they may get colds more often. In the second place,
meat
is a fertile source of many nutrients,
such
as iron or zinc and amino acids. Zinc is responsible for the growth and development of bone and muscle tissues.
In addition
, zinc ensures the normal functioning of the brain. Iron is indispensable in helping to transport oxygen to different parts of the
body
,
thus
allowing the proper functioning of all
body
organs.
Beside
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Besides
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, amino acids are not synthesized in the
body
. They take part in muscle recovery and in maintaining the health of the skin, hair and nails. Despite the fact that, vegetarian or vegan can partially satisfy the need for proper nutrition, when it comes to health, going for
typical
Correct article usage
a typical
show examples
vegetarian
diet
can lead
irreversible
Change preposition
to irreversible
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processes in the
body
.
To conclude
, the exclusion of
meat
from the
diet
can lead to various diseases of any organ
systems
Fix the agreement mistake
system
show examples
.
Thus
, I do not recommend completely excluding
meat
from the
diet
.
Submitted by alexareptile on

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coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structure more to enhance readability and keep the reader engaged.
task achievement
While your arguments are clear, incorporating a wider range of sources or evidence could strengthen your position.
task achievement
Exploring the counterarguments in more depth would add nuance to your essay, showcasing a balanced understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Be wary of overgeneralizing the effects of a vegetarian diet without acknowledging individual dietary needs and variations.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear, effectively framing your argument.
coherence cohesion
You've successfully organized your essay, making your points easy to follow.
task achievement
Use of specific examples of nutrients and their effects on the body helps support your arguments.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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