ountries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#ountries #people #products #world #development

Nowadays, Individuals have the chance to access

products

all over the world and it leads to forming a similar society.

This

essay will illustrate why

this

is a positive progress.

Due to

developments in technology and transportation systems, most

products

and merchandise have been globalized, and people around the world can use them from developed to undeveloped countries.

Subsequently

this

wide access provides circumstances for the majority of communities to keep in touch with the newest and most advanced technological commodities, which can be employed in different

industries

and accelerate development trends.

For example

, with the emergence of AI, different companies like Apple and Tesla have utilized it to launch better versions of their

products

Furthermore

according to

this

homogenization, entrepreneurs and companies focus on the

industries

they are talented in, and they don’t need to divide budgets across all

industries

while

they can acquire

products

from countries that are experts in those specific sectors.

Therefore

this

not only reduces redundancy and parallel efforts but

also

accelerates development by enhancing the concentration of each society on its core competencies.

For instance

, Toyota can stay focused on introducing more high-quality resistant

products

implementing

Correct word choice

and implementing

show examples

AI to increase performance

while

simultaneously staying updated with the newest technology.

To sum up

, the generalized accessibility of

products

this

era effectively helps to reduce discrimination in utilizing new technologies across the world and

additionally

increases progress in different

industries

by employing updated

products

. It

also

reduces redundant efforts, allowing for more efficient use of resources globally.

Submitted by ali.homayoni93 on Sat Jun 15 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

The essay provides a clear response to the prompt and addresses both aspects of the question: how global access to products creates similar societies and why this can be seen as a positive development. To further enhance your task achievement, consider providing a more balanced discussion by mentioning potential drawbacks and then refuting them with stronger arguments supporting your view.

task achievement

Ensure each idea is fully expanded with sufficient supporting details. While you have mentioned some examples, providing a bit more detail on how these examples directly support your main points will strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

The essay is quite well-organized with a clear structure. However, there are a couple of areas where the transitions between ideas could be smoother. Using more varied transitional phrases will help create a better flow between sentences and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame your arguments, which is excellent. However, try to make your conclusion a bit more comprehensive by briefly summarizing the main points discussed in your essay.

task achievement

You have addressed the essay prompt effectively and have provided a well-rounded response highlighting the advantages of this global trend.

coherence cohesion

Your ideas are logically structured, and each paragraph effectively introduces and explores a distinct point related to the main argument.

task achievement

You have used relevant examples to illustrate your points about technological advancement and the benefits of global access to products.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Historical artifacts should be brought back to their country of origin. To what extend do you agree/disagree?
In contemporary days, the issue of shipping ancient items to their original nations sparked debates. Some advocate bringing back these artifacts for potential benefits, while another disagree with this. Diving deeply and explaining why I agree with repatriation of those objects are the main aim of this essay.
5
band
In the future all cars ,buses and trucks will be driver less.The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driver less vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.
The automobiles we know now will be so different in the future, such as cars, buses and trucks without drivers and inside the cars will be only passengers, no more drivers. I really believe that the future without drivers sounds good. In this essay, I will discuss why I believe that the advantages are over the disadvantages.
6.5
band
Obesity is an ever-growing pandemic that is affecting more and more of the world's population. The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. •What is the reason for the growth of the number of overweight people in society? How can this issue be resolved?
Obesity is an increasingly widespread epidemic impacting a growing number of people worldwide. The number of individuals at risk of severe health issues due to being overweight is rising. This essay will discuss about the causes of this phenomenon and give some solutions to tackle this issue.
<4
band
Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.
In my opinion, it depends on what poorer countries need to deloveped their country. Some poorer countries need financial aid to slove their poverty and some countries need the supplier. As you can see, during Covid pandemic poorer countries highly need supporting from the rich countries. Thus, some poorer countries need Covid-nineteenth vaccination and medical supply to offer to their people and some need financial aid to support their country economic while they were lockdown so most of the countries affected not only poorer countries. For example: In Cambodia which is the developing country so they need the money flow from the rich countries to support their economic leading to attract investors and consequences to get more potential and opportunity to offering people to get job in order to improve their GDP. Furthermore, they either need supporting from tourism from the rich countries because eighty percent of income comes from tourists so turism is entire part of economy so it i...
5.5
band
There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.
An increasing number of married couples around the world choosing to remain childless. The main benefits of not having a child for couples are that they can focus on their careers and have more time for themselves. The main drawbacks are that they could not fit into their peers’ group and have no one to look after them when they get old.

ountries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Your opinion

Historical artifacts should be brought back to their country of origin. To what extend do you agree/disagree?

In the future all cars ,buses and trucks will be driver less.The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driver less vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.