Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development

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In modern life, many
people
Use synonyms
think that bloggers, tubers and other well-known personalities throughout social media and TV are earning a lot of money even more than politicians because many young adults are interested in having fun and the advertising of many celebrities works by many communications websites.I believe that it is a positive development . one of the main reasons for the huge quantities of financial returns to famous
people
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is that many youngsters like to know the news and watch shows about actors ,singers and other artists who are displaying their work on websites and companies
such
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as Disney and Netflix. I believe that they deserve to have these returns because
people
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need to enjoy and know what is happening around them.
For example
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,many actors and bloggers earn a huge amount of money because they share their previous
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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and post it on apps
such
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as Instagram and Facebook. Another essential cause is that they are showing their film products and songs on YouTube, Facebook and other apps making really good advertisements for their work neither by showing emotions or feelings
Zsuch
Correct your spelling
such
as music nor by giving the follower the merits of these goods .
For instance
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, A lot of Singers connect sad or happy emotions to the listeners and make and that will make good ads for them and
moreover
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increase their brand's popularity.
To conclude
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, Many well-known
people
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who are preserving fun, knowledge and valuable messages and feelings deserve to have higher salaries than humans who are working in governments.
Submitted by moonymum0011 on

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introduction clarity
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paragraph structure
Work on paragraph structure to improve readability. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea, introduced by a clear topic sentence.
grammar
Be consistent with your use of tenses and ensure subject-verb agreement for a smoother reading experience.
vocabulary
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punctuation
Pay attention to punctuation, especially comma use, to avoid run-on sentences and clarify your meaning.
spelling and capitalization
Check spelling and ensure proper nouns (e.g., Instagram, Facebook) are consistently capitalized to maintain professionalism.
use of examples
You effectively use examples to support your points, adding weight to your arguments.
task response
Your essay addresses both parts of the question, discussing reasons and providing a clear stance on the development, which demonstrates a good understanding of the task.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • endorsements
  • revenue streams
  • global presence
  • diversified branding
  • income sources
  • free-market principles
  • market value
  • government budgets
  • public funds
  • public perception
  • value generation
  • bureaucratic
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
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