It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (e.g. Dinosaur, dodos …) There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. Do you agree or disagree?
Some people say that extinction is a natural process and a plethora of
species
evolve to replace each other. They assume that there is no reason to focus on Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
phenomenon
and waste any effort to end it. From my perspective, it is a partial reality to explain vanishing of the animals and the issue needs some attention to slow it down or completely end it which will be examined Correct article usage
a phenomenon
further
in the essay.
Linking Words
To begin
with, humans are entering some unchartered territories of Linking Words
the
nature. They are recklessly poaching animals. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, the turtle Linking Words
species
are under continuous threat. Not only Use synonyms
adult
turtle gets killed for Add a missing verb
do adult
its
flesh but Correct pronoun usage
their
also
people use Linking Words
its
eggs to sell them in the black markets. There are numerous animals whose existence got threatened Correct pronoun usage
their
due to
the killings to satiate Linking Words
the
human avarice Correct article usage
apply
such
as white Linking Words
tiger
and even some of the bird Fix the agreement mistake
tigers
species
. Use synonyms
Hence
, hunting is not a natural process but it is an illegal activity. So, stringent regulations have to be placed to Linking Words
encounter
hunting and it could slow down the evasion of the Verb problem
avoid
species
.
Use synonyms
Moreover
, the Linking Words
food
chain is disturbed Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
unnatural
disappearances of many Correct article usage
the unnatural
species
. These Use synonyms
species
are Use synonyms
a
part of an ecosystem which is interconnected for each Change the article
apply
others
needs. If one creature disappears Change noun form
other's
then
other parts of its Linking Words
food
chain will be affected. Use synonyms
For instance
, if Linking Words
tiger
Correct article usage
the tiger
will
completely Verb problem
apply
vanish
Correct subject-verb agreement
vanishes
then
Linking Words
Correct article usage
the deers
deers
population will explode and they will become Change the noun form
deer
burden
on the environment for their Add an article
a burden
food
. The forest cannot accommodate the Use synonyms
food
needs Use synonyms
for
an outnumbered deer populace. Change preposition
of
As a result
, many Linking Words
species
will automatically die in Use synonyms
this
struggle. Linking Words
Hence
, the unnatural causes for the animal's death should be identified and deterred.
In conclusion, natural extinction is a slow process and nature itself adapts to the changes it makes. Linking Words
However
, man-made disasters like poaching should be undone or investigated Linking Words
otherwise
Linking Words
its
consequences might be detrimental Correct pronoun usage
their
for
the earth.Change preposition
to
Submitted by Kiran on
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Task Achievement
Ensure a clear thesis statement is presented in the introduction to directly address the prompt.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and interest.
Task Achievement
It's beneficial to briefly mention the counterargument to provide a more balanced view.
Task Achievement
You effectively used specific examples to support your points, enhancing the essay’s persuasiveness.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with clear paragraphing that aids in the presentation of ideas.