IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 0.5

The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#internet #access #information
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Nowadays we feel very exactly that the internet is spreading information as fast as sunlight is reaching
to
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the Earth. Technologies are developing faster too. All
this
 data filled our space,
nevertheless
 what type or
in
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to
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 what extent is true
.
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?
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While
 we were finding
out
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answers to our initial questions, other questions related to a bunch of new information were blamed on our minds. Let’s consider the positive and negative sides of
this
 question.
Submitted by kooper507 on

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Introduction improvement
A strong essay typically starts with a clear introduction that presents the topic and your view on it. Consider refining your introduction for clarity and focus.
Example use
Develop your points with specific examples and explanations. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.
Argument balance and conclusion
A balanced argument examines both sides of the issue, but remember to clearly state your own position. Make sure your conclusion reflects your view and summarizes the main points effectively.
Essay structure
Work on structuring your essay more logically. Organize your points in a way that makes your argument flow smoothly from one idea to the next.
Relevance
You have touched upon the critical aspect of information overload caused by the Internet, which is a relevant and thought-provoking point.
Balanced view
Your proactive approach to considering both the positive and negative aspects of the topic shows a good understanding of the need for a balanced discussion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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