You have been working in a company for the last two years. Recently, your computer in the office has started giving some problems and it is affecting your work performance.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter,
describe the problem
explain how it is affecting your work
write what you want him to do regarding it
Write at least 150 words.
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
, I would like to maintain my computer by contacting our IT department.
Your assistance in
this
matter would be highly appreciated.
Correct the word
Yours
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Your
Correct your spelling
Yours
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sincerely
Dewey
Submitted by d11206 on
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logical structure
Consider organizing your ideas more clearly to enhance the logical flow of your letter. While the structure is adequate, it could be refined for better comprehension.
greeting and closing
Work on minor spelling and grammar errors to improve the clarity and professionalism of your letter.
single idea per paragraph
Each paragraph presents a clear idea, but ensure you expand on these ideas for a more thorough explanation.
complete response
Your letter successfully addresses the task requirements but could be enhanced by providing more specific details about the problems and potential solutions.
suitable writing tone
The writing tone is overall suitable for a letter to a manager, but watch for informal phrasing that might not be appropriate in a professional context.
task achievement
You've effectively communicated the urgency of the issue and its impact on your work.
task achievement
Your direct request for a solution shows a proactive approach to problem-solving.
greeting and closing
The letter opens and closes appropriately, which is suitable for formal communication.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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