In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
In
this
modern era, new technology
is being invested by governments
in many countries
to deal with the problems
in society. This
situation occurs because of the demanding
Replace the word
demand
in reducing
time spent on solving Change preposition
to reduce
problems
. This
writer believes that the development in
modern Change preposition
of
technology
is a suitable use of government money.
It must be acknowledged that high-tech devices
bring a lot of benefits back to human society. Nowadays, the
Correct article usage
apply
devices
are being used in every fields
to help people Change to a singular noun
field
on working
more effectively. Finding Wrong verb form
work
solution
to solve the public Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
also
need
new Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
technology
too
. Rephrase
apply
Due to
the advantages that modern devices
bring back to society including cutting down on the number of labourers to deal with social problems
. Moreover
, the use of technology
like artificial intelligence also
helps people to make a
Correct article usage
apply
decision
faster and more Fix the agreement mistake
decisions
effective
.
The cost of modern Change the word
effectively
technology
is not an affordable price so many companies and governments
have to pay a fortune to own these
Change the determiner
this technology
these technologies
technology
. Despite the high cost in
modern Change preposition
of
devices
, many governments
decided to pay for this
development and it has brought back a huge income and solve
Wrong verb form
solved
problems
more effectively. Take many developed countries
in Europe, these countries
have applied a lot of applications to manage their citizens. These applications integrate many
personal information including Correct word choice
apply
ID
card or license of Correct article usage
the ID
its
owners. Correct pronoun usage
their
Due to
it
, Correct pronoun usage
this
government
can find information Add an article
the government
of
their citizens easily by scanning QR codes on these applications.
Change preposition
about
To conclude
, this
writer believes that investing in new devices
to deal with public
is an appropriate use of government money because of the pros of Add an article
the public
technology
devices
. Due to
it
, many Correct pronoun usage
this
governments
in
around the world are using Change preposition
apply
these
Change the determiner
this technology
these technologies
technology
to manage their countries
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specificity
Ensure that the examples provided are precise and directly relevant to the arguments being made to enhance clarity and coherence.
coherence
Consider using a wider range of transitional phrases to improve the smooth flow between sentences and paragraphs.
exemplification
To better support your argument, include more diverse and explicit examples from various countries or specific technological advancements.
tone
Maintain a formal tone consistently throughout the essay; avoid using casual or colloquial expressions.
structure
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the discussion, providing a clear thesis statement and a concise summary.
conceptual understanding
The essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic with a clear argument that investing in technology is a suitable use of government funds.
topic sentences
Good use of topic sentences to introduce the main idea of each paragraph.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?