Some people say that competitive sports have advantages for people from different groups and countries, while others believe that competitive sports only create problems between people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is universally accepted that competition in sports can have various advantages for several types of groups and nations.

However

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, there are those who argue that

this

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action leads to crucial issues among individuals.

This

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essay will examine both perspectives and outline supporting reasons throughout the following paragraphs. On the one hand, it is worth considering that there are many benefits to competitive sports to consider. The initial matter to be mentioned is that sport has become a business; most sportsmen utilise their talents to make a salary for themselves, especially in football games. When these athletes need to compete with others, it may build enjoyment and money from viewers.

Moreover

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, creating a reputation for those countries is usually organised by administrations and governments, leading to the Olympic Games.

Thus

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this

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action leads to countries' income, whether entrance fees or economic growth.

On the other hand

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, it is undeniable that conflicting with numerous competitors can be an obvious example of

this

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. One of the main reasons is that more and more competitors tend to be selfish and rude people, even with the level of stress they experience, which contributes them to paying more attention to their games than interacting with other players.

However

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, I believe that it is not only a way to create problems with individuals, but

also

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injuries to those players

such

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as mental and physical health. In conclusion, even though sports competition provides benefits and drawbacks, Those problems bring about several factors. From my point of view, I reckon that these sportsmen give many benefits to watchers and authorities.

sasinipapjSat Apr 20 2024

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Language Usage

Strive for a more varied and advanced vocabulary to better articulate your points.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure your essay flows smoothly by using a wider range of linking words and phrases for a more cohesive argument.

Supporting Details

Develop your examples further to provide a clearer and more detailed explanation of your points, particularly when discussing the impacts of competitive sports.

Content Depth

Avoid general statements without specific examples or detailed explanation to enrich the content of your essay.

Task Response

You successfully addressed both views and provided your own opinion, aligning well with the essay prompt.

Essay Structure

The structure of the essay, with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, effectively presents your argument.

Topic Coherence

Good effort in linking the main ideas in each paragraph to the overall topic of competitive sports.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
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Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
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Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Competitive sports
Advantages
Unity
Friendship
Cultural exchange
Understanding
Physical health
Mental health
Life skills
Problems
Rivalry
Hostility
Inequality
Discrimination
Pressure
Stress
Opinion

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Some people say that competitive sports have advantages for people from different groups and countries, while others believe that competitive sports only create problems between people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Eco-tourism often involves visiting remote and fragile ecosystems, which raises concerns about the impact on local cultures and indigenous communities. What problems can this cause? How can these problems be resolved?

Some people fail in school, but end up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is, in your opinion, the most important thing to succeed in life?

Students should pay full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?