Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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People
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have different views about how well older
people
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educate
children
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to become valuable citizens.
While
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some argue that
children
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should be disciplined by their
parents
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,
children
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should be educated on how to become respectable citizens at
school
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. There are various reasons why
people
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believe that
parents
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should teach their
children
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to develop good manners.
Firstly
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,
children
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are prone to listen to their
parents
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, who are influential in families.
For example
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,
children
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might worry about wrong actions, leading to their deciding whether they should commit
such
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behavior
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behaviour
show examples
patterns if they have been punished by their
parents
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before.
Secondly
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,
children
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have a close relationship with their
parents
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, whom they always count on whenever they meet tough times.
Children
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,
therefore
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, may pour their concerns quickly into their
parents
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' hearts.
Hence
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,
parents
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can give timely advice, one of the most critical factors in deterring
children
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from becoming perverse.
Finally
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, not only do
parents
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verbally bring their
children
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's rights, but their life
behaviors
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behaviours
show examples
can profoundly influence their
children
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because
children
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tend to imitate the actions of older
people
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. Despite these arguments, I am inclined to argue that schooling would play an essential role in forming
children
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's characters.
Children
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spend the most significant amount of time at
school
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except at home.
Thus
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, teachers are likely to be second
parents
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to teach
children
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about the rights and wrongs in every walk of life. Admittedly, teachers can be stricter with
children
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than
parents
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because
parents
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usually spoil their
children
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excessively. Under
this
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circumstance, education in
school
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is the best solution to building a good personality for
children
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.
Moreover
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, the
school
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environment will enable
children
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to find out their abilities or desires by attending some recreational physical activities or studying specific subjects;
this
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is beneficial to
children
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in becoming well-rounded individuals in the future. In conclusion,
besides
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being primarily responsible for educating
children
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's
parents
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, schools
also
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prevent
children
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from the misguided frame of mind to be productive
people
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in society.
Submitted by aamenis on

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion. This will set the tone for your essay and make your stance clear from the beginning.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs. This will enhance the cohesion of your essay.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your points. This makes your arguments more convincing and demonstrates a deeper understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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