IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people trust their first impressions about a person’s character because they believe these judgments are generally correct. Other people do not judge a person’s character quickly because they believe first impressions are often wrong. Compare these two attitudes. Which attitude do you agree with?

Some individuals believe in their
first
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 feelings about a
person
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's representation because they consider these views to be sound.
On the other hand
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, opponents say that it is wrong to judge a
person
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upon
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at
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first
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 glance. Personally, I am leaning towards the latter opinion and think that it is crucial to spend more time understanding other
people
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. In
this
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 essay, I will observe these two strategies and give my own view on the matter. The
first
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 approach suggests we should not question our
first
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 impression of a
person
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.
For example
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, when meeting a new colleague, one might form opinions about
this
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person
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 based on their appearance, the tone of their voice, and other cues. These
first
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 pieces of information may be helpful to establish a better connection and adapt someone's behaviour to meet the interlocutor's criteria.
However
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, relying solely on these impressions may lead to mistreatment or be offensive. The other way of getting to know other
people
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 does not require us to believe in our initial perception.
For instance
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, we could like the visage or manner of speaking of a
person
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 and internally believe that they are a good
person
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. The other day, we may meet
this
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person
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, and they might ask us to do something inappropriate. In usual circumstances, we would do that, but our
first
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 good impression may make us do it still. I think some culprits take advantage of
this
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 phenomenon.
This
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 issue could be mitigated if we continuously build our trust and shift our views on a
person
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accordingly
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. In conclusion, exclusively judging
people
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 based on
first
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 impressions may cause troubles in communication, and help malicious
people
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 to commit crimes. Using
first
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 thoughts about individuals might be helpful at
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first
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, but it is more secure to change views and be sceptical to overcome
mentioned
Correct article usage
the mentioned
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 issues.
Therefore
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, I think it is wrong to entirely believe in
first
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 impressions.

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Improvement
Although your essay provides a clear stance and supports it with logical reasoning, further diversification in sentence structure and more precise examples could enhance clarity and impact. Aim to incorporate a wider range of sentence types and more detailed, specific examples. Doing so may strengthen your argument and make your writing more engaging.
Enhancement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, but including a comparative analysis between the two views before stating your position could add depth to your argument. Consider examining the contrasting attitudes more directly and assess their merits or drawbacks before concluding with your own perspective. This approach not only demonstrates your analytical skills but also enriches the content of your essay.
Structure
Your introduction and conclusion are clear, effectively framing your argument and summarizing your position, which enhances the overall structure and coherence of your essay.
Flow
You have successfully maintained a logical flow throughout your essay, making it easy for readers to follow your arguments. This coherence is a key strength of your writing.
Examples
Your essay uses relevant examples to support your points, though there's room for more specificity. These examples contribute to the task achievement criterion by illustrating your arguments.
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