The continued rise in the world’s population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

#rise #world’s #population #humanity #time

There is no

doubts

Fix the agreement mistake

doubt

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that the

world

nowadays has more

population

compared to the

world

couple

Add the preposition

couple of

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decades ago. There were wars and diseases that took lives away. Now that

this

earth has regained people back, does it become a serious incident

instead

This

essay will

disscuss

Correct your spelling

discuss

the underlying cause and the opinion

whether

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on whether

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it is human society’s greatest concern. The

world

before was restricting the

population

to grow.

However

such

situations are unlikely

happens

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to happen

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anymore.

Instead

, the proportions are now getting larger

while

the reasons

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

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vary; the strict rules on abortion in some religions,

the

Correct word choice

and the

show examples

financial struggle in accessing or being educated about birth control which are often found in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

developing countries or some

area

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areas

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While

the rest of the

world

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

factually facing

‘

Correct article usage

an ‘aging

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aging

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ageing

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society’ issue, the

population

research in many countries in East Asia, Europe, and Northern America often illustrates the number of people in their 50 and older proportions

are

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larger than the 50 years old and below,

this

indicates that the younger generation rate of birth

are

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show examples

far less than their

parents

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parent's

parents'

show examples

generations. The most recognisable case is what Japan are facing now; the conditions are not supporting their residents to have children at all; over workload,

high

Correct word choice

and high

show examples

cost of living making it difficult to raise kids.

This

consequence is considered

the

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show examples

major problem in their country because it might be difficult to propel their country. It might be true that

population

overgrowth is concerning and needs

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

careful

inspections

Correct the article-noun agreement

inspection

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, yet, not all

part

Fix the agreement mistake

parts

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the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

world

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

experiencing the same thing; many countries are

are

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

facing what is the opposite and

also

need to tackle

Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on Mon Apr 22 2024

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task response

Ensure your essay directly answers each part of the question. Your introduction is promising, but make sure your conclusion clearly states your stance on whether the population rise is humanity's greatest problem.

coherence cohesion

Work on developing a more structured progression of ideas throughout your essay. Using paragraphs to clearly separate different points can enhance clarity and flow.

task response

Include more specific examples to support your points. This adds depth to your argument and makes your essay more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Be mindful of your spelling and grammar. Small errors can distract from your message, so taking time to proofread can improve the overall quality of your essay.

task response

Your introduction set a strong foundation for discussing the topic at hand.

task response

You've effectively outlined several causes for the population rise, showing your understanding of the topic's complexity.

task response

Your essay includes a good balance of discussing both sides of the argument, which shows a thoughtful approach to the question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The continued rise in the world’s population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it a valuable work experience, which is important for learning and taking responsibility. What is your opinion?

Many people find it difficult to speak in front of and to present to anaudience. It is believed that this skill should be taught in school. Why is this important? To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

You are going to take a short holiday in Singapore and you want to rent a holiday apartment while you are there. Write to the tourist information office. In your letter: -Explain what you need. -Say when you plan to be there. -Ask for information about prices.

Some people say that feeling of competition should be encouraged in children others say they should be taught to become cooperative. What is your opinion?

More people live alone today than they did in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give your opinion and relevant examples to support your view.