The graphs below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

#graphs #shops #country

The line graph provides key information about the figure of

shops

that closed and the number of new

shops

that opened in one region from 2011 to 2018. The units are measured in numbers.

Overall

, it is clear from the graph that the closing of

shops

shows a gradual increase

at the end

of the period.

In addition

, the new opening chain was at its peak

then

it showed a significant decrease in the end,

whereas

closures increased dramatically.

According to

what is shown,the closure

shops

Change preposition

of shops

show examples

was around 6500

shops

in 2011, in the next year it plunged to around 6000, and following to next two years it showed a gradual increase to 7000

shops

in 2013.

However

, it showed an insignificant decrease of nearly 500 in 2015,

then

it rose up to 5200

at the end

of the period In terms of the newest opening

shops

were at the top around 8500

shops

in 2011,in the next year it plunged to half,

then

it fluctuated for the next 5 years.

Moreover

, it was the lowest figure in the period about 3000 in 2015.

Submitted by zaidamrat5 on Mon Apr 22 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words shops with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 4 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "plunged" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.

▼

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

184 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The graphs below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Water pollution has become an increasing problem over the past few decades. What causes water pollution? How can we prevent this problem?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same thing and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think the best way to motivate and encourage people to work hard is to pay them based on how much they produce and sell. Do you agree or disagree? Include relevant examples from your own experience.