Some people believe that it is better to live and work in a vertical city with multiple tall buildings, as compared to a horizontal city with fewer tall buildings. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #work #city #buildings

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Nowadays, there is a growing trend of migration towards big

cities

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for settlement and employment opportunities. In

this

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essay, I will discuss both perspectives on

this

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phenomenon and provide my own opinion. On the one hand, there are numerous advantages to living and working in a vertical city.

Firstly

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, individuals have the opportunity to work for corporations that are typically housed in skyscrapers,

such

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as Sony, Apple, Amazon, and others.

This

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can enhance their social status

due to

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the prestige associated with these corporations.

Furthermore

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, there are more options for housing in multistory buildings, which offer convenience and access to the latest technologies, leading to a higher standard of living.

On the other hand

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, the concentration of tall buildings in

cities

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results in higher population density.

Consequently

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, in the future, overcrowding may become a significant issue compared to

cities

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with more horizontal expansion.

Moreover

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, living in a vertical city often leads to time pressures, as individuals are occupied with their jobs, compounded by frequent traffic congestion during commutes.

This

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can have a direct negative impact on their physical and mental well-being. In conclusion,

while

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living in a vertical city offers benefits

such

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as job opportunities and social advancement, it

also

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brings challenges like high population density and work-related stress.

Therefore

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, it is important to carefully consider both the advantages and disadvantages before making decisions about settling in big

cities

Use synonyms

Submitted by cathyngo1512 on Tue Apr 23 2024

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Specific Examples

To further improve, consider integrating more specific examples and details to solidify your discussion points. While broad statements about the perks and pitfalls of living in vertical cities are effective, the addition of more concrete examples or statistics could make your argument even more compelling.

Personal Insight

Your essay would benefit from a bit more exploration of your own stance. Though you've provided a summary of your viewpoint in the conclusion, expanding on why you hold that opinion, possibly with personal insights or broader societal implications, would enhance the overall task response.

Logical Structure

Well-structured essay, exhibiting clear organization of ideas which aids in reader comprehension.

Introduction & Conclusion

Effective use of an introductory and concluding paragraph to frame your essay.

Supported Main Points

Your main points were clearly supported throughout, helping maintain a coherent argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

229 words

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Some people believe that it is better to live and work in a vertical city with multiple tall buildings, as compared to a horizontal city with fewer tall buildings. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar ,which causes many health problems .Sugary products shoud be mad more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar . do you agree or disagree ?

Some people think educated people more valuable than people who learned skills through experience Do you think educated people are most valuable for societ? What kind of skill can people learn through experience that can benefit society?

Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyles in the countryside. other believe that there are health benefits of living in cities. discuss both view and give your opinion

Nowadays, people are moving to other countries to seek jobs. Some people think it affects the children of such home negativity while some others think it is beneficial to them. Discuss both sides and state your opinion