IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Most people pay taxes to contribute to the development of their country, however, some think they have other responsibilities rather than paying taxes. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #taxes #development #country #think #responsibilities
In the contemporary world,
tax payers
Correct your spelling
taxpayers
show examples
 play a crucial role in the advancement of the economy , but some individual believes in not paying
taxes
 to the government.I partly agree with
this
 assertion and
this
 essay will acknowledge the validity of
this
 statement and elaborates on my reason . On one hand ,
people
 pay different kinds of
taxes
 every day
such
 as tolls, salary , goods and services
as well as
 trade . All
this
 is taken by the authorities and spent on the development of infrastructure, welfare schemes, free education ,
pensions
Correct word choice
and pensions
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 for the old citizens .
For example
 , Sydney road transport charges a fee
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 car registration and road tax for using motorways.All
this
 money will spent on laying new roads and widening existing ones.
In addition
 to that, all
this
 helps to commute easily every day.
However
 ,
on the other hand
 ,there are some
people
 who do not want to pay
taxes
 because of their low standard of living especially middle-class and lower-class families. But many rich
people
 are not actually paying
taxes
 all over the world ,investing smarty in exemption business
as well as
 buying properties .
For instance
 ,In India super rich
people
 are buying land in rural
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 where the government want to develop the area
as a result
 they are getting an exemption .These facilities are not
choosing
Wrong verb form
chosen
show examples
 by normal citizens
due to
 less purchasing power ended up paying huge duties . In conclusion, the government should frame
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
policies that benefit both salary earners
as well as
 wealthy individuals. They should collect lesser
taxes
 from lower income groups and higher from the rich .
This
 will help them grow balanced,and in
return
Add a comma
return,
show examples
 it boosts the economy .
Submitted by nikhilguni on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure clarity and avoid overly complex sentences that may detract from the coherence of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Consider diversifying your sentence structures to enhance readability.
general
Be mindful of grammatical accuracy to maintain the overall effectiveness of your argument.
task achievement
Use specific examples to vividly support your points. The inclusion of concrete examples from Sydney and India adds depth to your argument.
task achievement
Clarify your opinion more distinctly in the introduction and conclusion to enhance the persuasiveness of your essay.
task achievement
The essay effectively discusses both viewpoints and articulates a clear stance, contributing to a strong task achievement.
coherence cohesion
You've successfully used logical structuring and paragraphing to develop your argument, which aids in coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
Inclusion of specific examples to back your arguments strengthens the essay's persuasiveness.
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