IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dresscode. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?

While
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 there are educational facilities which enforce strict dress code regulations, some schools embrace a more relaxed route and won’t insist on a specific regulation
clothing
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of clothing
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 or restrictive rules about
students
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’ clothing.
Although
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 both groups have the best for their
students
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 in mind, each approach has some benefits and drawbacks. One reason that many educational facilities resort to rigorous dress code regulations and possibly specify a few uniform options for their pupils
,
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apply
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 is for them to not be so preoccupied with their daily attire and eventually to save their time and energy for more productive tasks, which is a valid point in my opinion, since it is not easy for
students
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 to mix and match different outfits every morning.
Additionally
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, it keeps their other pieces of clothing from being damaged
due to
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 being washed so often, resulting in saving money as well.
Moreover
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, wearing homogenous apparel gives
students
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 of a certain institute a sense of unity, which fosters teamwork and helps them to function better as a group.
Furthermore
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, the aforementioned method presents some downsides as well. Being bound to wear a specific uniform could damage one’s sense of self. As ,especially teenagers, tend to express themselves through their appearance, being limited on that front may repel them from school and education.
Not to mention
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 that pre-made uniforms may not fit all bodies and sizes properly, which could eventually lead to body dysmorphic disorders in children with smaller or larger figures. In conclusion, I would argue that schools’ dress code is an intricate subject, it might make some
students
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 feel oppressed if it is too restrictive and limited to a specific uniform, and at the same time, can become a liability if they are too lenient,
hence
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, a mild approach could probably be the best route and prove most beneficial for the younger generation.

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coherence and cohesion
Consider making your introduction more engaging by adding a hook to capture the reader's attention immediately. It would help set the tone for your essay.
coherence and cohesion
In your conclusion, summarizing the main points briefly or restating them could help reinforce your argument more clearly.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or anecdotes to support your ideas, particularly in discussing the downsides of uniforms. This would enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Focus on refining sentence structures and grammatical accuracy to improve clarity and sophistication in your writing. Some sentences could be more concise.
task achievement
You have clearly outlined both the advantages and disadvantages of school uniforms, which meets the task requirements effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Your points are generally logical and flow in a way that makes sense, helping the reader follow your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Uniformity
  • Discipline
  • Peer pressure
  • Economic disparities
  • Collaboration
  • Belonging
  • Identity
  • Simplification
  • Appearance
  • Stress levels
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