Many people believe that music is just a form of entertaintment, whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (250 words)

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Whether musical tracks have profound effects on humans of
this
Linking Words
generation or not is a vital subject of public debate.
Although
Linking Words
different
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
music
Use synonyms
used to be a part of recreational activities, I will argue that the art of performing instrumental devices is not just
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
intertaining
Correct your spelling
entertaining
content. There is a widely held view among people
spesifically
Correct your spelling
specifically
elderlies that
musican's
Change noun form
musican
show examples
artwork plays a role as an
inseprable
Correct your spelling
inseparable
part of each party on account of the fact that listening to
music
Use synonyms
is a form of
intertainment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
. To clarify, they believe it only way of its usage with no other advantage. Raising people's
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
, smartphons
provids
Correct your spelling
provides
provide
a massive source of knowledge for
mankinds
Correct your spelling
mankind
which includes the importance of
music
Use synonyms
and
moreover
Linking Words
a great playlist
consisted
Wrong verb form
consisting
show examples
of various types.
For instance
Linking Words
, there were
classial
Correct your spelling
classical
classic
ones
as well as
Linking Words
pop and jass, to name but a few.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it has been combined with human lifestyle and each part and
parcle
Correct your spelling
parcel
of our life have been
depent
Correct your spelling
spent
dependent
on it. The significant usage of
music
Use synonyms
,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, occupied our daily routines. Not only do we play it whenever we want to do some particular activity, but
also
Linking Words
music
Use synonyms
-related jobs are reported to grow in popularity these days owing to society's demands. The career in
this
Linking Words
industry develops a substantial population who invested their lives and creativity to form and revise
this
Linking Words
section of art. Making money,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
has become by far one of the most well-known and serious
feild
Correct your spelling
fields
of job.
Hence
Linking Words
, the fame of
music
Use synonyms
tracks has been gone
beyound
Correct your spelling
beyond
leisure activities and has had more
potentail
Correct your spelling
potential
. In conclusion, I argued about the importance of
music
Use synonyms
and its potential
roats
Correct your spelling
role
in each
person
Change noun form
person's
show examples
life
despit
Correct your spelling
despite
some disagreements about the assertive idea of soundtracks being just an amusement.
Submitted by momenzade.mahna1999 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentence Structure
Try to vary your sentence structures to enhance clarity and coherence. Using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences can make your essay more comprehensible and engaging.
Grammar & Spelling
Ensure your essay is free from spelling and grammar errors. Consider revising phrases and words that might be spelled incorrectly or used inappropriately to enhance the overall clarity and professionalism of your writing.
Paragraphing
Use paragraphs to structure your essay, separating different ideas clearly. This helps guide the reader through your argument more effectively and improves the overall flow of the essay.
Supporting Examples
Provide specific examples to support your points. This adds credibility and depth to your argument, making your essay more convincing and engaging for the reader.
Topic Understanding
You effectively discussed both views on music's role in society, showing a good understanding of the essay topic.
Conclusion Clarity
Your conclusion succinctly summarizes your viewpoint, demonstrating a clear stance on the issue.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: