Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying altrnative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#people #health #altrnative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development

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Some people believe that it is more beneficial

cosuming

Correct your spelling

consuming

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines

Use synonyms

rather than taking advice from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

traditional physicians. I

firemly

Correct your spelling

firmly

believe that

although

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

trend of taking

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines

Use synonyms

carries both

positive

Fix the agreement mistake

positives

show examples

and negatives, I would argue that the disadvantages are far stronger. Admittedly, there are some benefits associated with

this

Linking Words

development.

Firstly

Linking Words

, these categories of drug remedies

contains

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contain

show examples

fewer side effects

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

allopathy

medicines

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, the basic compositions of

Ayurvedhic

Correct your spelling

Ayurvedic

medicice

Correct your spelling

medicine

Change the verb form

are

show examples

made

Change preposition

from

show examples

the extracts of herbal plants and

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

parts.

Hence

Linking Words

, there is no

chances

Fix the agreement mistake

chance

show examples

of occuring adverse reactions in patients.

Secondly

Linking Words

, most of the

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines

Use synonyms

regimes are affordable for the

beneficieries

Correct your spelling

beneficiaries

that

Linking Words

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

greatly

supports

Correct subject-verb agreement

support

show examples

the economically weaker populations in our society. To exemplify that, the locally available natural remedies

using

Wrong verb form

used

show examples

in Unani and Siddha drugs can be provided

Change preposition

show examples

lower retail

prize

Correct your spelling

prices

show examples

Nonetheless

Linking Words

, despite the positives mentioned above, I believe that

this

Linking Words

development is negative

overall

Linking Words

for two reasons. One is that, there

Change the verb form

are

show examples

no clinically tested or proven practices in the field of

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines

Use synonyms

thus

Linking Words

, there

Change the verb form

are

show examples

possibities

Correct your spelling

possibilities

for malpractices and

fraudulant

Correct your spelling

fraudulent

activities.

For example

Linking Words

majority

Correct article usage

the majority

show examples

these kind

Change the determiner

this kind

these kinds

show examples

of drugs

doesn't

Correct subject-verb agreement

don't

show examples

undergoes

Change the verb form

undergo

show examples

certain

kind

Fix the agreement mistake

kinds

show examples

of quality

checkes

Correct your spelling

checks

checked

checkers

and safety standard monitoring authorizations by the Government drug

contole

Correct your spelling

console

control

departments that may lead to mishaps and epidemic events like community hazards and morbidities among people those were using these categories of drugs. Another point to consider is that there

Change the verb form

are

show examples

possibities

Correct your spelling

possibility

of proper diagnostic methods followed by the practitioners of

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines

Use synonyms

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

to the certified Doctors.

For instance

Linking Words

, there are more incidents of commencement of treatment without conducting recommended diagnostic tests in naturopathies,

whereas

Linking Words

, modern doctors prefer to find out the disease conditions and initiation of required

treament

Correct your spelling

treatment

of choice only after doing clinical and radiological tests in sick clients. In conclusion ,

while

Linking Words

I acknowledge the possible upsides of giving more preference to

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines

Use synonyms

, it is my personal conviction that the downsides are more pronounced.

Submitted by dixonpeter24 on Wed Apr 24 2024

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Spelling and Typos

Try to maintain consistency in spelling, such as 'Ayurvedic' instead of 'Ayurvedhic', and be mindful of typographical errors like 'cosuming' (consuming), 'firemly' (firmly), 'beneficieries' (beneficiaries), and 'prize' (price). Ensuring correct spelling contributes to clarity and professionalism in your writing.

Use of Linkers

Consider using a wider range of linking words to help transition more smoothly between ideas and paragraphs. While your essay is logically structured, enhancing the use of connectives can improve the flow and coherence of your argument.

Argument Development

For better task achievement, ensure that each paragraph clearly addresses the prompt. Your essay admirably outlines both sides of the argument; continuing to refine how each paragraph's main idea supports your stance will enhance clarity. Include more varied and specific examples to substantiate your arguments further.

Introduction and Conclusion

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame your argument, demonstrating good capability in structuring your essay.

Balanced Argument

You've done well to provide supporting points for both the advantages and disadvantages of alternative medicines, which shows a balanced approach to answering the essay question.

Use of Examples

The inclusion of specific examples, such as Ayurvedic medicine and government drug control departments, helps to illustrate your points clearly.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

331 words

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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying altrnative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

These days many parents want their children to study a second language such as English. Do you think it is important for younger children to study a new language? Do you think schools should teach every student in primary school a second language?

In some countries, owning a house rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

People living in the 21st century have a better life quality than people who lived in previous times. to whta extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation? w

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? Do you think this a positive or a negative situation?