The pie charts below show the devices people in the 18 to 25 age group use to watch television in Canada in two different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

#show #devices #people #age #group #television #canada #two #years #summarise #information #features #comparisons

This

chart depicts the ages from 18 to 25 using electronic items in Canada in various years.

Overall

, it is clearly apparent, that the Conventional

has the highest proportion of

usage

besides

the desktop computer

also

the second highest

usage

However

, in the other

year

Add a comma

year,

show examples

both of these became the least favourite Respectively.

To begin

with, In 2009 Conventional

had the highest user base among all other electronic products with above a quarter ratio of around 34% but after a decade Conventional

became the lowest in

usage

rank at 4%

likewise

, Desktop Computer was second place with 18% of ratio but throughout the period there was a steadily dive in the percentage of 6% and remains with 12% in 2019.

Furthermore

, the Laptop

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

previously accounted for around 20% and after a year of decline it stood at 12%.

In addition

, Flat-screen

was the second lowest

usage

in 2009 but

throughout

Change preposition

over

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time there was an increment in resurgence and became the most usable electronic device in 2019.

While

in the beginning Tablet was having

usage

to 5% but afterwards having a steadily upwards it stood up till 19%.

lastly

, earlier Mobile phones were recorded at 15% and after 10 years it seems an increased by 11% (26%).

Submitted by tushalk329 on Wed Apr 24 2024

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words tv, usage with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

▼

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

212 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The pie charts below show the devices people in the 18 to 25 age group use to watch television in Canada in two different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

.some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. ohters believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future , such as those related to science and technology. discuss both views and give your own opinion

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situations?

Many today feel that attention spans are becoming shorter due to the prevalence of social media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a person improves their intellectual skills more when doing group activities. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?