Increasing numbers of students are going to university instead of working after high school. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people who do this?

An increasing number of students choose to continue their education by attending
university
rather than entering the workforce after finishing high school. Enrolling in college can be a pathway to acquiring vocational skills and expertise with the potential to have high-paying employment opportunities,
however
, there are negative aspects to be taken into consideration.
Firstly
, one benefit of students pursuing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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higher education is that they develop skills and expertise in areas required for specialist work. Becoming a doctor,
for instance
, requires in-depth studies in anatomy,
while
the IT industry
also
demands in-depth studies in engineering and algorithms.
Secondly
, having a higher degree is the key to receiving an increased level of salary.
Therefore
, achieving a
university
degree can help individuals enter a professional workforce with superior compensation compared to a high school diploma.
On the other hand
, one problem when students engage in
university
learning is that it potentially leads to lack
a
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an
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of work experience to assist in developing an attractive resume
to enter
Verb problem
apply
show examples
for potential Human resources departments to view.
For example
, the majority of employers require at least one year of experience working for junior-level positions. So
this
can, in the long run, be challenging when entering the job market. Another possible downside is that committing to a specific field of
university
studies early can lead to missing out on the opportunity to discover different career paths or industries. In conclusion,
while
attending
university
is advantageous as a track for entering the professional workforce, it can
also
result in a lack of work experience for building a resume and missing out on opportunities to explore various occupations.
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Coherence and Cohesion
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Task Achievement
You've clearly addressed both advantages and disadvantages, maintaining a well-balanced discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively encapsulate the main ideas presented, which is integral for a cohesive argument.
Task Achievement
The main points are supported with relevant examples, although more detail could provide a stronger case.

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