Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today’s world and should be closed. What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?

#people #zoos #purpose #today’s #world #alternatives

Nowadays majority of

people

argue about

zoos

being. As an entertainment type a lot of cons for both

Animals

and

people

. In

this

essay, I will discuss the problems that

people

zoos

can bring and the alternatives they are banned. On the one hand, the

people

who object to

zoos

according to

myself if they are coming to the

zoos

get uncomfortable.

For instance

, the lions inside the cage are afraid of

people

's noise and feel stressed. Because of children's noise and other crowds.

As a result

, they are trying to harm the lives of children and scare

animals

Moreover

, as some

animals

are natural, claimant change can cause sickness that could be transmitted to the air visitors.

On the other hand

, there are many solutions but that.

Firstly

people

can watch TV programs Animal Plant or National Geographic which will open more opportunities

secondly

, some individuals can travel to African countries where they can watch

animals

' lifestyles. In conclusion, the

zoos

can bring to

people

positive things.

This

please

are

Change the verb form

show examples

animals

Rephrase

why animals

show examples

get uncomfortable for wild

animals

. Alternatives

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

mentioned above give the possibility

to lose

Change preposition

of losing

show examples

local

zoos

.the

animalsbe

Correct your spelling

animals

animals be

free in their natural habits.

Submitted by ma.ushamanu1024 on Thu Apr 25 2024

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Introduction

Try to clarify your introduction by stating your main argument more clearly and providing a brief overview of the points you will discuss.

Paragraph Development

Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within it directly support that idea.

Supporting Examples

Use specific examples to support your points more effectively; general statements are less persuasive.

Logical Structure

Work on organizing your essay more logically; this includes having a clear progression from introduction to body paragraphs to conclusion.

Conclusion

Revise your conclusion to more clearly summarize your main points and restate your position on the topic.

Engagement

You engaged with the topic and attempted to cover both sides of the argument.

Task Response

You suggested alternatives to zoos, which shows an effort to tackle the second part of the question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

195 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

ethical and animal welfare
artificial habitats
psychological distress
abnormal behaviors
conservation
inbreading
wildlife sanctuaries
rehabilitation centers
naturalistic habitats
virtual and augmented reality
ecotourism
wildlife documentaries
educational platforms
genetic pool
immersive experiences
conservation education

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Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today’s world and should be closed. What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?

Fully explain your ideas

Many products that we buy are made in other countries. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this phenomenon!

Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?

Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both theese attitudes and give your own opinion.

Some people say History Is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subfects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays many students have the opportunity to study for part or all of their courses in foreign countries. While studying abroad brings many benefits to individual students, it also has a number of disadvantages. Do you agree or disagree?