Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today’s world and should be closed. What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?
Zoos
used to be very popular, but now they are becoming faded. Because the
artificial habitats are not suitable for many species and there are some accuses of exploiting entertainment, many Correct article usage
apply
people
believe that zoos
should be closed as soon as possible. Establishing more wildlife
sanctuaries and rehabilitation centres would be a good solution if zoos
are removed.
Zoos
no longer bring benefits such
as education or conservation to people
. In contrast
, it causes a lot of criticisms
about whether Fix the agreement mistake
criticism
government
should close them. The artificial environments cause physical problems and psychological distress to Add an article
the government
animals
. Lack of space will make some species become uncomfortable and affect on
their health. Change preposition
apply
Furthermore
, some businesses make a profit from animals
and visitors. That is
why the educational value of zoos
is debated.
Wildlife
sanctuaries and rehabilitation centres, where animals
are provided with more spacious and natural habitats. Advances in virtual and augmented reality technology offer immersive and impactful educational experiences, enabling people
to learn about animals
in their natural environments without causing harm. Conservation-focused ecotourism gives people
the opportunity to observe wildlife
in its natural habitat under controlled, ethical guidelines, supporting local communities and conservation efforts. Lastly
, comprehensive and accessible wildlife
documentaries and educational platforms can significantly contribute to conservation education, fostering a deeper understanding and respect for wildlife
without the need for physical confinement.
To sum up
, zoos
should be closed because of the impacts on animals
and be altered by sanctuaries or rehabilitation centres.Submitted by [email protected] on
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coherence cohesion
Continue refining your understanding and use of connective words to ensure smoother transitions between ideas.
task achievement
Consider expanding on your examples by providing more specific instances or statistical evidence to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures to improve readability and engage your reader more effectively.
coherence cohesion
You effectively introduced and concluded your essay, clearly stating your position on the issue.
coherence cohesion
You provided a well-structured argument, discussing both the problems with zoos and suggesting viable alternatives.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic, with clear and comprehensive ideas that are relevant to the question.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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