Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe it actually encourages crime. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #technology #development #decreases #crime

Individuals have different views about whether

technology

expansion reduces offence or not.

While

some agree it helps to prevent crime commitment, I believe that

technology

has boosted the crime level in society and I will explain my idea in

this

essay. It is considered by the majority of states that new technologies provide the possibility of controlling

criminals

in order not to let them repeat their offences. Some devices

such

as security cameras are being invented to watch out for the properties by the owners and the police

as well as

to ensure safety.

Furthermore

, new technologies give the chance to people to use face-locks or fingerprints to be certain about their belongings. There is no way to unlock these codes.

For instance

, the bank's security systems are quite impossible to crack. There is ample evidence that despite

technology

contributing the safety systems, it provides some equipment for

criminals

to simplify their plans. As we can see in some movies thieves use the newest developments to carry out their crimes.

Besides

criminals

try to update their knowledge

along with

the expansion in

technology

, to overcome the competition between

technology

and themselves. The more

technology

develops, the better ways they find to enable it. A case in point is the hackers who commit their crimes even

while

they are in jail.

Consequently

although

some suppose that

technology

is a helpful means to shrink the amount of crime done by low-breakers, I am of the opinion that it provides some new routes for them to escape from police traps. It can be

therefore

argued that technological development is not only in favour of ordinary people and authorities, but it is

also

being used widely by

criminals

Submitted by keyhan454 on Sat Apr 27 2024

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Detail

While your essay effectively discusses both views and your own opinion, integrating more specific, real-world examples could strengthen your argument.

Evidence

Make sure your examples are realistic; using movies as evidence may weaken your argument as films are not reliable sources for evaluating real-world issues.

Style

Consider varying your sentence structures and transitions for fluidity. Using a mix of simple and complex sentences can improve the readability and coherence of your essay.

Balance

Including both perspectives and your own opinion gives a well-rounded view of the topic.

Content

You have effectively used technology-related examples to support your points, showing good subject knowledge.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

deterrent
surveillance
forensic science
cybercrime
data theft
anonymity
illicit activities
law enforcement
jurisdictions
crime prevention

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Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe it actually encourages crime. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

To what extent do you think that cashless transactions will replace traditional money?

It is impossible to help all people around the world in need so governments should focus on people from their own country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some students decide early in life to pursue vocational careers that involve cooking or baking. For them, it is better to study their chosen occupations in high school rather than regular subjects. To what extent do you agree of disagree?

Some people feel that entertainers(eg.film stars,pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid?

Many people leave the countryside for the greater opportunities which are offered by cities. This move is not without disadvantages for both people and the environment. What are some benefits and drawbacks of urbanization?