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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activity that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #leisure #time #activity #mind #word #puzzles #rest
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The debate over how to spend
leisure
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time
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 is a timeless one, often highlighting contrasting perspectives on the purpose of
relaxation
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 and mental stimulation. On one hand, there are those who advocate for engaging in
activities
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 that actively stimulate the
mind
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,
such
Linking Words
 as reading, solving puzzles, or learning new skills. Proponents of
this
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 view argue that
leisure
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time
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 offers a valuable opportunity to expand one's knowledge, improve cognitive abilities, and enhance
overall
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 mental well-being. They believe that dedicating
leisure
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time
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 to intellectually stimulating
activities
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 not only fosters personal growth but
also
Linking Words
 helps individuals stay sharp and mentally agile.
On the other hand
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, there are those who emphasize the importance of resting the
mind
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 during
leisure
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time
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.
This
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 perspective suggests that in today's fast-paced world, where individuals are constantly bombarded with information and stimuli, it is crucial to allow the
mind
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 to unwind and recharge. Advocates of
this
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 view often advocate for
activities
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such
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 as meditation, mindfulness, or simply taking leisurely walks in nature. They argue that giving the
mind
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 a break from intellectual pursuits can reduce stress, promote
relaxation
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, and improve
overall
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 mental clarity and focus. Both views have their merits, and the choice ultimately depends on individual preferences, personality traits, and lifestyle factors. For some, engaging in mentally stimulating
activities
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 during
leisure
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time
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 may be invigorating and fulfilling, providing a sense of accomplishment and intellectual satisfaction. For others, the prospect of taking a break from mental exertion and embracing
relaxation
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 may be more appealing, offering a much-needed respite from the demands of everyday life. In my opinion, striking a balance between these two approaches is key to maximizing the benefits of
leisure
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time
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.
While
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 it is important to challenge the
mind
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 and engage in
activities
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 that promote mental growth, it is equally important to recognize the value of rest and
relaxation
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. Incorporating a mix of intellectually stimulating pursuits and restorative
activities
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 can help individuals lead a more balanced and fulfilling life, nurturing both the
mind
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 and the spirit. Ultimately, the goal of
leisure
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time
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 should be to rejuvenate and replenish oneself, allowing for personal growth and well-being in the process.
Submitted by maher123123ed on

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task achievement
To enhance your essay, consider incorporating more specific examples to solidify and illustrate your points. Examples can make your arguments more relatable and persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your ideas flow smoothly from one to the next by using a variety of linking words and phrases. This will strengthen the cohesion of your essay.
task achievement
Your essay effectively discusses both views and provides a clear personal opinion, which addresses the task fully.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, significantly aids reader understanding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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