In some areas of US, a "curfew" is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be outdoors after a particular time at night unless they are with an adult. what is your opinion about this?

Nowadays in some parts of United States, adolescents are restricted to go out of their house after certain time at night, unless they are accompined by an adult. I completely agree with
this
statement because, the increasing number of crimes and irresponsible nature of young children it is unsafe for them to stay out of their safe place. With increasing crime rates it has become dangerous for an individual especially a teenager to stay out of their home for really long hours at night.
Moreover
, theft, robbery, and stabbing has become
such
a common thing that it is important for parents to impose a restriction on their kids in and out time.
For instance
: Statastics shows that there has been a massive increase in the stab victims in US and most of them are teenagers.
Furthermore
, teenagers are at
such
a vunerable stage of life, going through multiple changes (mentally and physically) in their body that it is easy for them to indulge themselves into wrong habits
such
as: smoking, drinking and drugs. It is difficult for the children in the age group of 13- 19 years to understand the consequences of their actions. To exemplify: In northern Island, the police stop and catch young teenagers with bottle of alcohol every weekend. In conclusion, I believe
due to
sky rocketing statastics of crimes happening around the world it is unsafe to send young adults alone out at night.
In addition
to that, as their minds are not fully developed to make the difference between right and wrong choices it is quite easy for them to get into trouble.
Submitted by vasudha.gupta0818 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Provide more diverse examples and evidence to strengthen your argument, especially from a variety of sources or regions, to support your claim about the effectiveness of curfews in reducing crime and protecting teenagers.
Coherence and Cohesion
Be attentive to spelling and grammar, particularly with word forms and punctuation. Mistakes such as 'statastics' instead of 'statistics', and 'vunerable' instead of 'vulnerable' can slightly distract from the clarity of your message. This aspect is important for higher bands.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance your essay by developing a more complex sentence structure and using a wider range of vocabulary. This will make your writing more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for your discussion, clearly stating your stance on the issue.
Task Achievement
Use of concrete examples, such as the statistics about stab victims and the situation in Northern Island, effectively supports your main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion successfully summarizes your main arguments, reinforcing your perspective.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • curfew
  • delinquent activities
  • safeguard
  • instil discipline
  • anxiety
  • hazardous
  • infringe
  • social development
  • rebellious behavior
  • strain resources
  • critical issues
  • root causes
  • teenage delinquency
  • superficial solution
  • constructive engagement
  • unintentional bias
  • profiling
  • marginalized groups
What to do next:
Look at other essays: