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Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people believe that the high levels of violance in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced.

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In current discussions, there is widespread concern about the excessive
violence
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 in
films
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 and its perceived negative effects on society. Some argue that
such
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 portrayals can make people less sensitive to
violence
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, accepting it more readily in real life, and others say
this
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 issue is complex and needs careful examination.
This
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 essay will explore the social problems associated with
violence
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 in
films
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 and suggest ways to lessen its impact.
To begin
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 with, one major issue arising from the prevalence of violent content in
films
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 is its potential to make viewers less sensitive, especially young and impressionable ones. Exposure to graphic
violence
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 might make people less bothered by it, leading to a reduced aversion to
violence
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 in real-world situations.
Moreover
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, constant exposure to violent imagery can make
violence
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 seem normal, distorting perceptions of how to handle conflicts and encouraging aggressive
behavior
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behaviour
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.
Consequently
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,
this
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 desensitization could contribute to higher rates of
violence
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, especially among groups like teenagers.
However
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, addressing the impact of
violence
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 in
films
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require
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requires
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 multifaceted approaches.
Firstly
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, there is a need for stricter rules to limit the unnecessary depiction of
violence
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 in
media
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, especially in terms of age restrictions. Implementing effective age verification systems and imposing harsh penalties for violations can help protect young audiences from exposure to inappropriate content.
Additionally
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, promoting
media
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 literacy programs that teach individuals, particularly young people, how to critically assess and understand
media
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 representations of
violence
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 can empower them to make informed choices. In conclusion,
while
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 the prevalence of
violence
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 in today's movies presents various societal challenges, concerted efforts to regulate and educate can help
reducing
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reduce
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 its harmful effects. By encouraging responsible
media
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 consumption and enforcing strict rules, society can address the negative consequences associated with the abundance of violent content in movies, fostering a safer and more alert
media
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 environment.

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task achievement
Ensure to include more varied and specific examples to illustrate the impact of violence in films on society. This will strengthen your argument and provide a clearer understanding of the issues at hand.
coherence cohesion
Although your essay structure is well-organized, consider exploring diverse viewpoints in depth to add complexity to your discussion.
logical structure
You've effectively structured your essay with a clear introduction, well-supported main points, and a thoughtful conclusion.
task achievement
Your discussion comprehensively addresses the task, presenting clear and detailed ideas about the problems caused by violence in films and suggesting viable solutions.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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