The media has become too influential in peoples lives today and this is a negative development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In today's fast-paced
world
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, the
media
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and the internet play a crucial role in our day-to-day lives.
while
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some believe that social
media
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could waste our time and compromise privacy, I contend that
media
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could have both pros and cons and
i
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I
show examples
will elaborate on my opinion. On the one hand, some argue that the
media
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could be detrimental to human society. They state that a large part of our time in the day is devoted to social
media
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.
As a result
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, we forget to do other work or activities like hanging out with friends and doing physical activities.
Although
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people
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share their holidays and weekend activities with other
people
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by posting photos or videos on social
media
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, they seriously sacrifice their privacy and share anything of their lives, even private ones, with strangers.
On the other hand
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, it is obvious that the latest
news
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is released by social
media
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at the moment. In the past,
people
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all over the
world
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waited for the morning newspaper or cable TV channel to be aware of what was happening across the globe. Fortunately, nowadays, thanks to social
media
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such
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as X, Facebook and Instagram, the
news
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spreads all over the
world
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in a second and there is no difference between
people
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from various countries.
For example
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, the
news
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about COVID-19 in China was broadcast all over the
world
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quickly and other countries had a chance to do some precautionary acts in order to prevent
this
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virus.
In addition
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, we can change our social
media
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's privacy and policy setting to prevent misuse.
Thus
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, by social
media
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and the internet, it is much easier than in the past to know about a variety of
news
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and events, like political, social and economic ones. In conclusion,
while
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some
people
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argue that the
media
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should be banned and restricted
due to
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some reasons, regardless of all these causes, I strongly believe in the freedom to use the
media
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for any purpose, because it is capable of increasing our awareness about the
world
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's latest
news
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.
Submitted by hesam.kord.f on

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Introduction
Ensure a clear thesis statement in your introduction to guide the reader.
Coherence
Introduce each paragraph with a clear topic sentence that reflects the main idea.
Cohesion
Enhance coherence by using a wider range of linking devices effectively.
Example
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Argument Development
Consider a more balanced development of both sides of the argument in the body paragraphs.
Conclusion
Revisit the conclusion to make sure it effectively summarizes the essay without introducing new information.
Content Balance
You provided a balanced view by discussing both potential negative and positive impacts of the media.
Structure
The essay is well-structured, with clear paragraphs for each main point.
Conclusion Clarity
Your conclusion succinctly restates your opinion, maintaining a clear stance throughout the piece.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • influential
  • sensationalism
  • conglomerates
  • biased
  • misinformation
  • exacerbating
  • constant exposure
  • unrealistic standards
  • homogenization
  • critical thinking
  • foster
  • community engagement
  • social change
  • public opinion
  • perceptions
  • corporate interests
  • mental health issues
  • traditional cultural
  • educational sources
  • responsibly
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