It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the the disadvantages ?

#people #risks #lives

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Nowadays, many

people

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suppose

that is

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essential to put

themself

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in risky circumstances which include both aspects, Occupation

lives

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and personal

lives

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. From my perspective, I strongly agree that taking

risks

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can bring plenty of benefits for the ones who can face to. In the occupation field, taking

risks

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is a dangerous action that can make

people

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lose everything they have and

also

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their confidence and optimism in their

lives

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For example

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, some

people

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who have a sustainable job try some risky way to develop that job more, and employees might be fined because their actions can have a detrimental impact on their company or cooperation.

However

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, taking

risks

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is totally possible and

that is

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also

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an effective way for individuals who have enough knowledge and brave characteristics.

For instance

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, studying and following new trends of jobs,

then

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making plans carefully can help

people

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easily access the

risks

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which bring

people

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potential opportunities. In that way, they can gain success if that plan works. Evening taking

risks

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doesn't occur effectively,

people

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still obtain experience and useful knowledge.

On the other hand

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, taking

risks

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can apply to

people

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in their personal

lives

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. Sometimes, putting

themself

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out of their safe environment can make

people

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make new choices and decision for real situations in life.

For example

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, for the young generation nowadays. They are scared to try new things and accept their current life.

That is

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the reason why young

people

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can not take the peak of knowledgeable sources like the old

people

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did in the past.

In addition

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, another benefit of

trying

Verb problem

taking

show examples

risks

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can help

people

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widen their social network more.

For instance

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, some shy individuals tend to feel disappointed in themselves and do not have enough confidence to make friends can lead to narrowing

themself

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into a small zone. But just try to be brave and raise their optimism a little bit, they can encounter their issues easily. Taking

risks

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is still useful in social situations

such

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as marriage, family and society. In conclusion, sometimes trying to take

risks

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or make a risky decision can make some situations get worse.

However

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that is

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also

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a good idea to try and face new difficult challenges

as well as

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obtain useful lesson with experiences to involve

themself

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to become the best version.

Submitted by phamletrungkien1230 on Tue Apr 30 2024

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Grammar & Clarity

Make sure to proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and improve sentence structures for enhanced clarity.

Language Use

Try to vary your sentence structure more to demonstrate a wider range of language skills.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use linking words to better connect your ideas and paragraphs, enhancing the overall flow of your essay.

Task Response

You effectively addressed the topic, presenting clear arguments for why taking risks can be beneficial in both personal and professional lives.

Examples & Support

You provided relevant examples to support your main points, helping to illustrate your argument effectively.

Essay Structure

Your essay has a good structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion that address the prompt comprehensively.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

379 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the the disadvantages ?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the popluation in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In the past, knowledge was contained in books , Nowadays is uploaded to the internet. Do the advantages pf this outweigh the advantages

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon. Others say that traditional education is irreplaceable. Discuss both views and give your opinion.