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Writing Samples
Band 8

An increasing number of people is buying what they need on the internet. Discuss advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies shopping online.

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In today's modern society, many people across the world increasingly tend to purchase most of the things from online platforms
such
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 as Amazon and eBay including other local channels in their own countries.
This
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 essay will depict both the strengths and weaknesses of
this
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 new trending behaviour for buyers and suppliers. Regarding the buyers's side, purchasing behaviour has been transforming from offline to online procedures for a decade.
Firstly
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, online purchasing could significantly encourage buyers' transactions with delivery services. These are able to be a crucial factor that contributes to people's laziness.
For example
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, new generation communities are likely to spend much free time on smartphones,probably more than 5 hours a day. They could stay home and submit a clothing order via smartphone in just a few seconds completing the transaction and waiting for a few days to receive it. It is obvious that customers could save a lot of time
instead
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 of commuting to the shopping centre.
Conversely
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, cyber security is another crucial issue concern because many thousands of websites have been made to facilitate the customers' behaviour. To exemplify
this
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 statement, buying a new smartphone from a registered supplier website could be safer than an unreliable group.
On the other hand
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, an increasing amount of online purchasing is directly beneficial to shopping companies because of gaining more profits.
This
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 causes the expansion of the company staff to support the new department with responsibility for the website and logistics including marketing strategy.
For instance
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, a team selling home appliances need to create their own websites and official social media accounts,
such
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 as Facebook and Instagram, to promote its products
as well as
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 launch new group announcements.
As a consequence
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, hiring more staff to be responsible for
this
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 department is a necessary process,with a higher budget.
On the contrary
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, joining the market easier means lots of competitors emerging in the industry at the same time, with a kind of similar product.
This
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 might require more attention and a great marketing strategy to compete with those.
To conclude
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, there are both pros and cons with regard to these actions.
This
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 depends on how people are able to handle their money and needs.

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Grammar
Ensure consistency in verb tense usage for a more polished delivery.
Style
Consider diversifying your sentence structure to enhance readability.
Grammar
Pay close attention to singular and plural forms to ensure accuracy.
Cohesion
Incorporate a variety of linking words and phrases to smoothly connect your ideas.
Introduction
Your introduction effectively sets up the essay topic.
Content
You've demonstrated a clear understanding of the topic by discussing both advantages and disadvantages for individuals and companies.
Content
Good use of examples to support your points.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarises your discussion.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Convenience
  • Selection
  • Price comparisons
  • Physical inspection
  • Fraud
  • Security issues
  • Impersonal
  • Global market
  • Overhead costs
  • Customer data
  • Market analysis
  • Competition
  • Shipping and logistics
  • Technological updates
  • Cybersecurity measures
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